Ass Kisser Strawberry Wit
Ass Kisser Ales

Ass Kisser Strawberry WitAss Kisser Strawberry Wit
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From:
Ass Kisser Ales
 
California, United States
Style:
Witbier
ABV:
5.8%
Score:
69
Avg:
2.73 | pDev: 23.81%
Reviews:
14
Ratings:
41
Status:
Retired
Rated:
Feb 06, 2021
Added:
Apr 04, 2012
Wants:
  0
Gots:
  1
No description / notes.
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Ratings by Beeraphernalia:
Photo of Beeraphernalia
Reviewed by Beeraphernalia from Connecticut

1/5  rDev -63.4%
look: 1 | smell: 1 | taste: 1 | feel: 1 | overall: 1
My wife's aunt always comes to visit for the holidays and simply loves fruity beers and lambics. I usually buy her a Samuel Smith's Organic Strawberry or Raspberry when she visits. It used to be Lindeman's, but that stuff is about 2.1% and I needed to upgrade her from a foo-foo spritzer to a semi-foo-foo beer. So I've been going with the Sammy's until this Thanksgiving I spotted the Ass Kisser Strawberry Wit. Naturally, I thought, for $18.99 a six pack, this stuff has to be delicious!!!!

Thanksgiving rolled around and I cracked open my freakin' delicious Shed Mountain Ale while I served my aunt-in-law her strawberry Ass Kisser. I noticed throughout our entire dinner that my aunt-in-law hadn't had more than a sip of her beer. I asked her if it was good and out of sheer politeness she said, "yes." no other comments. Typically, she raves about how delicious the beers I get her taste.

This was a dead issue until the next night when we had 5 of the 6 beers left. I gave my wife one to try and she said that it tasted like Budweiser mixed with sharp tangy cat urine. I said, "Well your aunt liked it," and she replied, "my aunt poured it down the drain when you got up from the dinner table to change the baby's diaper!" WHAT! That's $3.00!!!! She poured it down the drain!!!!

After hearing that, I just had to try one. AND sure enough, it has been confirmed by my ultra superior beer master sommelier tasting skills: This beer tastes like carbonated feline urine. I can't even taste a strawberry unless a cat urinated on the exact strawberry that was responsible for flavoring the 6 beers that were in my $19.00 six pack.

I know everything on every shelf in my liquor store's beer aisles, so I know this beer was new, and not one of those dust covered six pack of Octoberfest that you'd find in Mid-July. This beer was fresh from the brewery, so Ass-Kisser can't play the "old beer" card.

Just avoid it! Stick to something else like Sammy Smith's or even Sam Adams Strawberry. Half the price and it doesn't taste like kitty pee.

The price tag is the real shocker, $18.99! Are you nuts? In fairness, I even drank the whole bottle hoping it would grow on me, but I guess you can drink sip after sip of pee and it's still going to taste like pee.

I give this beer an F!!!! Or what I would like to give it is an F$#%! If Ass Kisser wants to kiss my ass they can make a strawberry beer that tastes like strawberries and charge $10.00 for a six pack. In addition, filter this beer! I almost choked to death on all of the damn sediment!!!! I thought I was drinking a snow globe! Thank you.
Nov 27, 2012
More User Ratings:
 
Rated: 3.43 by Jonnybgood from Massachusetts

Feb 06, 2021
 
Rated: 2.62 by iRun2Beer from Minnesota

Sep 02, 2015
 
Rated: 3 by aussiebeer from Illinois

Mar 24, 2015
 
Rated: 2 by ImperatorScab from Tennessee

Aug 03, 2014
 
Rated: 1 by atpca from California

Jul 16, 2014
 
Rated: 3 by rob99er from California

Jul 16, 2014
 
Rated: 2.5 by Latarnik from New Jersey

May 31, 2014
Photo of FocusDave
Reviewed by FocusDave from California

2.58/5  rDev -5.5%
look: 3.75 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3
Poured from a 12 oz bottle into a small goblet. Left the sediment in the bottle; no extra B vitamins today.

A - Pours a pale gold with slight haziness. Two fingers of creamy off white foam and plenty of carbonation. Looks like a bottle conditioned wit.

S - Smells like strawberry juice. Not getting any yeast, malt, or hops. Just strawberries, which I guess is good if you're into that.

T - The blast of strawberry that overpowered the nose is mysteriously gone. I taste yeast and bread. Tastes like Duffy bread. Not too pleasant. The more I drink, the more I get a hint of fruit juice.

M - Mouthfeel is surprisingly not bad. Bright and bubbly with a clean finish.

O - I wouldn't suggest offering this beer as a way to kiss your boss' ass, as suggested on the label. Someone else will probably get the promotion.
Apr 22, 2014
 
Rated: 1.5 by DuffDaddy from Florida

Dec 17, 2013
 
Rated: 2.75 by humulusphile from California

Dec 17, 2013
Photo of HalfFull
Reviewed by HalfFull from California

2.98/5  rDev +9.2%
look: 3.5 | smell: 3 | taste: 3 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 3
22 oz. bottle poured into a pint glass. Never seen this beer before today, and never seen the brand outside of BevMo here in SoCal. Pours a hazed lemon/orange with a thin cap of whitish foam which sticks around moderately.

Nose of strawberry, wheat and yeast with a light funkiness imbued through it all. Strawberry notes are a bit artificial as expected and remind me somewhat of that strawberry milk powder as a kid. Still there's enough balancing factors to keep it from deterring too much.

Taste offers a less prominent berry influence than the nose might suggest. Slightly grainy in taste and with a light coriander spice. Pretty standard on the feel and finish though does come up a bit short as a witbier in that the wheat influence is a bit subdued and the carbonation a bit light. Better than feared after seeing a few reviews but not something I'll be returning to either. Still, likely an older than maybe it should be wit though no date code to be found on bottle.
Dec 12, 2013
 
Rated: 3 by jaydoc from Kansas

Oct 20, 2013
 
Rated: 3 by GraduatedCashew from California

Aug 29, 2013
Photo of DavoleBomb
Reviewed by DavoleBomb from Pennsylvania

2.16/5  rDev -20.9%
look: 2.75 | smell: 2.25 | taste: 2 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2
Poured into a perfect pint.

2.75 A: Lightly hazed medium yellow color. One finger of frothy white head. Retention is below average and a touch of lacing is left.

2.25 S: Smells like those strawberry crispy cookie things. The ones with the white creamy stuff in layers. That's about all it smells like.

2.0 T: Tastes kind of like how it smells, but if you threw the cookie things in a pale ale. Not crazy about it.

2.5 M: Lighter to lighter medium body. Moderate carbonation but lacking creaminess.

2.0 D: Sucks. That's about all you need to know.
Aug 13, 2013
 
Rated: 3 by Irrationalist from California

Aug 11, 2013
 
Rated: 3 by alisatns from California

Aug 09, 2013
 
Rated: 2.75 by beernads from Florida

Jul 15, 2013
 
Rated: 2.5 by jucifer1818 from Florida

Jun 03, 2013
 
Rated: 3 by ENA from Maryland

Jun 03, 2013
Ass Kisser Strawberry Wit from Ass Kisser Ales
Beer rating: 69 out of 100 with 41 ratings