Dos Equis Special Lager - Cervecería Cuauhtémoc Moctezuma, S.A. de C.V.
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Ratings: 2,001 | Reviews: 524 | Display Reviews Only:
Reviews by ptykozoon:
1.25/5 rDev -54.2%
"Gringo!" he barked "Go take your fancy princess beer and shove it up your burro!" His shrieks echoed in the dry heat, the heat was instigating him, rivers of sweat ran down his leathery face like veins. He was a man at the constant point of no return, one of us was going to burn. As he started walking towards me I found that I could not move, the smell of his sweat arrived a few yards before he did and I found myself paralyzed by this animal of a man, now just inches away. A primal beast that didn't care about anything but proving his dominance over others.
I felt the fear swelling up in my stomach, finding myself more and more hopeless with each stilted breath I took in. I decided then and there, to my own surprise that I wasn't going to cower down in fear, I clenched every muscle in my body, looked him in the eye and almost shouted "Listen buddy I am drinking a La Fin Du Monde, its ABV is 10% alright, that's more than most bee..." He cut me off with furious throaty laughter, his head reeled back as he let out howls of insanity. "HAHAHA you fool..." he quickly slapped my glass to the floor, shattering it, all the time his eyes locked on mine, his smile now turning to an sinister grimace.
I stood there and felt myself getting sick, like the air I was breathing was toxic, I knew I had to get out of there, I felt my life was now in serious danger. So I did something wild, I punched him straight in the jaw as hard as I could and ran out of the bar at cheetah pace. My sprint was cut short when two grizzly looking men stopped me at the exit, they caught me and held me by the arms, slowly dragging me back to the bar. As my legs slid across the dirty floor I found myself screaming for help, but my yells fell on deaf ears as all the patrons seemed to have left when this group had walked in - I should have noticed I thought, should have known.
I was a child at that point, so scared and helpless I felt like I was going to throw up. As they lifted me up back onto the bar stool, the apparent leader of the group, the one I had just so recently signed my death wish with only grinned at me, his gnarled yellow teeth clenched like a madmans. "Now chico, we are going to have fun. You are going to drink a mans beer, so pick up your pencil and notepad and write about...this shit." His friends laughed softly, knowingly, like I was about to experience a fiendish torture only left up to the imagination, I imagined it would be some sort of drug or poison, some kind of shady toxin that would have me curled up into a pool of blood before my ultimate demise. He marched to the bar, grabbed a bottle off the shelf and walked back towards me, I was seeing double at this point, half dazed at the thought of my life ending so oddly.
He set the bottle on the table and pulled the cap off with his bare wrists, when he did, he and his cronies flinched back a little, as if they feared even a drop of it would be spilled anywhere near them. Their eyes all locked on to the bottle with a sort of fearful concentration, as if it were a python waiting to pounce. As I shook the dizziness from my head I managed to focus in on the label. "Dos Equis" It must have been a joke I thought, I looked back at them but they didn't laugh, in fact I was absolutely sure that what I saw in their eyes was fear, a real instinctual fear that even these monsters were terrified by. "Now" he said slowly "Pick up the bottle, and drink it. Write down your review for us." I wasn't sure but I thought one of them made the sign of the cross as I poured the bottle into a glass.
Light yellow, head is fizzy and light and dissipates in seconds. As I stare into the yellowness I hear voices in my head, like shrieks of pain from ghosts telling me to turn back, turn back..
The smell makes me nauseous, it is an overly sweet skunky raunchy stench that overpowers all the hot sweat in the room and fills it with the scent of death, the bar now smells like an ancient crypt for skunks.
I lift the beer to my mouth and begin drinking, tears quickly form in my eyes. What is this? Why does this taste the way it does? Where is the goodness in life? The piss flavored grime contaminates my stomach with its cruel flavors. The liquid evil that I drink not only rapes my throat but my innocence, my faith in the world. This carbonated death was meant only to destroy, to defeat ones soul entirely.
The mouthfeel is light and overly carbonated. Awful, just awful.
I find myself alone. No where is there a trace of my captors or anyone else. I am a null in the void. I feel completely alone in the universe. There is no light in the darkness....
11-26-2012 04:38:49 | More by ptykozoon
More User Reviews:
2.78/5 rDev +1.8%
Appearance Clear yellow body with a small up and down head.
Smell Light grain aroma but not much else.
Taste Theres actually some hops in there to balance out the malt and (mostly) grain flavors. No beginning, middle, and finish here just the one hit of taste then youre done.
Mouthfeel Nicely carbonated and fairly smooth.
Drinkability Its made to drink ice cold in the heat with a lime, so drink it ice cold in the heat with a lime.
08-18-2003 01:01:35 | More by RoyalT
3/5 rDev +9.9%
Dos Equis Special Lager is a mild pilsner with a mild flavor and a slight hop bitterness. Don't look for robust flavor. What you find is a crisp refreshing light ale that is great for the hot but breezy sun of Cancun. Light on the palate and very drinkable.
Dos Equis Special Lager is a beer that is best drank within it's environment just like Balashi from Aruba is. Reminds me of a less skunky Heineken. The pickin' is slim in Cancun so this is my top beer choice, even over Corona.
07-20-2009 16:20:07 | More by ExtraStout
1.53/5 rDev -44%
A thin yellow beer with crazy soda carbonation, not much smell, and a very thin grain taste with bitter bite and prominant booziness. Mothfeel is prettymuch like watery soda. Definately at the bottom of my list for Mexican lager. Move along folks, nothing to see here.
09-17-2006 15:44:02 | More by JudgeRoughneck
2.75/5 rDev +0.7%
As far as Mexican brews go, this is one that is on the edge of being something really good. It porued a medium golden color with minimal head that subsided quickly. The smell was grainy but with a bit of hops in there. The taste was almost pure euro-lager skunk but it was saved by a nice dry aftertaste the caught me by suprise. This is much better than Corona and Pacifico, but there must be better mexican brews out there.
01-25-2004 11:55:11 | More by Dmann
2.55/5 rDev -6.6%
I guess this is the type of beer to drink with some flame-throwing Mexican dish, because there isn't much taste. It's a yellow beer with a small white head. It had a mildly floral aroma, and that is about all you'll get from it. I couldn't taste much of anything, very insipid. Drink it if you must with some spicy dish, otherwise leave it alone.
07-06-2006 17:34:18 | More by lordofthewiens
2.63/5 rDev -3.7%
12 onz green "botella"
Appearance: Pale golden color with some white bubbles above.
Smell : There's corn ,cooked veggies and grains in this beer.
Taste: There's corn and cooked veggies in the taste also, some bitteness when you finish it
Drinkability: One of the best mexican lagers i have drink, not to compare with the amber one.
09-04-2007 07:31:13 | More by BeerDreadz
2.75/5 rDev +0.7%
Presentation: 12oz green bottle. No freshness date. That infamous "XX" adorns the bottle.
Appearance: A very pale yellow, bright beer with large carbonation bubbles and lots of activity. Heads pours a thin white bubbly lace, not at all impressive.
Smell: Spicy hop aroma with that cooked adjunct smell (corn), and a bit of European lager "skunk."
Taste: Crisp and refreshing up-front. Body is light. Malt sweetness is dextriny, with lots of sweet corn flavour. Hop bitterness is semi-spicy and herbal with a quick tangy snap that fades into a sweet tea-like flavour. More cooked corn/veggie flavours follow (aka DMS / dimethyl sulfide) and meld with a slightly dry grain flavour. Finish is clean with some light residual dextrins on the palate.
Notes: European/German brewing influences are apparent with this brew. It's not your typical Mexican lager/pils. And, even though it's essentially a mediocre beer, it's not an entirely bad beer. Pairs nicely with Mexican food or a nice alternative to American Lagers as it has a bit more body and flavour.
11-02-2001 00:00:01 | More by Todd
1.48/5 rDev -45.8%
The Dos Equis poured a very light, clear yellow with a fizzy head that was very quickly completely gone. It has a skunky, yet slightly floral nose. It's very thin and watery. There is very little flavor, just a sweetish starch and some slight skunkiness. Overall, it's a little better than some macros, but not by much.
03-10-2004 05:05:17 | More by Beaver13
3.05/5 rDev +11.7%
my father has been buying this beer in the summer time regularly. at the last resort i was at in mexico, this was the beer that was on tap almost every 100m. or so! i
i'll definately say this is a great warm weather beer for if you're outside doing activites or work! the wife doesn't mind it either, which is great too... onto the review...
A: Looks like most other lagers, light golden yellow color, the head vanished almost instantly, leaves hardly any lacing and has an incredible amount of bubbles.
S: kind of a grainy corn metalic smell with a hint of hops.
T: not a whole lot at the start but there is something there in the middle that's very enjoyable. when it goes down, there's a definate corn taste with a bit of grain. it doesn't really taste metalic.
M: watery, best describes it. thin, fizzy with a bit of body at the end makes it above being not impressed, but not average either.
D: quite good, excellent fishing trip beer. it's better than Sol which we tried when the LB was shorted the Dos Equis product.
i bought it after drinking it constantly in mexico, one really big + that isn't rated here is 'hangover factor'... this beer, like some others i can drink way in excess and not be trashed the next day.
07-14-2009 05:55:46 | More by EsoxLucius
Dos Equis Special Lager from Cervecería Cuauhtémoc Moctezuma, S.A. de C.V.
64 out of 100 based on 2,001 ratings.