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Totally Naked - New Glarus Brewing Company

Not Rated.
Totally NakedTotally Naked

Displayed for educational use only; do not reuse.
BA SCORE
84
good

949 Ratings
THE BROS
98
world-class

(view ratings)
Ratings: 949
Reviews: 273
rAvg: 3.68
pDev: 14.67%
Wants: 33
Gots: 96 | FT: 5
Brewed by:
New Glarus Brewing Company visit their website
Wisconsin, United States

Style | ABV
American Pale Lager |  4.25% ABV

Availability: Rotating

Notes/Commercial Description:
Pure and crisp this is a beer with nothing to hide. Wisconsin two-row barley malt ensures a mellow and smooth body. We imported Noble Hop varieties from Germany and the Czech Republic to ensure a fine mature aroma with no coarse bitterness.

(Beer added by: cokes on 09-24-2002)
Beer: Ratings & Reviews
Sort by:  Recent | Likes | High | Low | Top Raters | Read the Alström Bros Beer Reviews and Beer Ratings of Totally Naked Alström Bros
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Ratings: 949 | Reviews: 273 | Display Reviews Only:
Photo of mbrasi
1.8/5  rDev -51.1%
look: 3.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 1.5 | feel: 1.5 | overall: 1.5

Pours clear yellow golden with a light white head that dissipates fast. Very clear in glass I can actually see through this brew. I can't remember the last time I drank a beer that I could see through. It actually looks nice on first pour. Aroma is corn and some hops, not too unpleasant. Corn on the flavor, there is something promising in the flavor but it goes away fast..hops. Leaves that nasty watery grain finish in your mouth. I guess this is how a lager is supposed to taste though. Have to get ahold of one of those higher rated beers to know for sure. Not very carbonated and feels like slime in my throat. This is worse than drinking water because it has some flavor in it that I have to wash away using water. Drain pour.

Photo of ChainChompsky
2/5  rDev -45.7%

Photo of MillerMan16
2/5  rDev -45.7%

Photo of bashiba
2.05/5  rDev -44.3%
look: 3 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2 | overall: 2

This poured a macro like yellow with a fizzy white head.

The smell had a stale macro quality to it.

The flavor was a bit corny and flat with a light grassy hop finish, very much like a typical mass produced euro pils.

The mouthfeel was watery and thin.

Overall just not real good.

Photo of Winter
2.1/5  rDev -42.9%
look: 3 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2

Poured a light golden color. White bubbly head thins but never completely disappears. Aroma is a big turn off, with a slighty pungent, unappealing scent. I coudn't really nail it down. Body is thin with a pleasant crispness. Hardly any after-taste, but something seemed oily. I would not buy this beer again and it's a shame because it's the first New Glarus beer to let me down. New Glarus has such a fine stable of flavorful beers, that Totally Naked leaves you Totally Unimpressed.

Photo of scaliasux
2.15/5  rDev -41.6%
look: 2 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 2

Appearance - Clear, light gold. Bubbly. Thin soapy, white head. Looks like a macrolager.

Smell - Very faint malt and yeast. Pretty hard to detect - even for style.

Taste - Light but rich (a little caramel?) sweet malt flavor. One note, don't really notice any hops. Flavor is more full, and better, than any of the macrobrews. Even so, this is a bit uninspired.

Mouthfeel - Pretty good for a lager. Full and more foamy than bubbly. Not as astringent as many lagers.

Drinkability - I love most of the stuff made by New Glarus. This beer, though, is totally unnecessary. I hope New Glarus sells this stuff to the general public by the truckload, but I don't think I'll be a frequent quaffer.

Photo of KCM
2.25/5  rDev -38.9%

Photo of Devilman
2.25/5  rDev -38.9%

Photo of Huolis72
2.25/5  rDev -38.9%

Photo of dt_gbpackersfan
2.25/5  rDev -38.9%

Photo of Arsenal04
2.38/5  rDev -35.3%
look: 3.5 | smell: 3.5 | taste: 2 | feel: 2 | overall: 2

Pours light gold in a Pilsner glass with a very active body full of carbonation and a busy two finger, foamy head that dissipated completely four minutes after pour. Smell is mildly underwhelming, malt and lemon stand out amongst a background of grain - nothing that catches my attention or stands out so far. Taste is malt driven with an aftertaste that reminds me of Michelob Golden Light or any other American-made Lager - coats the throat in a way that makes me think back to nights gone by where I would have far too many beers for my own good. I had a feeling going into rating this beer that with my limited experience in the craft beer world that I would find too many similarities to the standard Lager beers found in the US. Nothing I would go rushing out to get again.

Photo of turdinathor
2.4/5  rDev -34.8%
look: 2 | smell: 3 | taste: 2 | feel: 4 | overall: 2

Appearance: golden color, No head, bland appearance.

Smell: not a lot of smell, maybe a little fruit but generally weak.

Taste: Boring, watery, bland, bitter

Mouthfeel: crip clean mouthfeel , very smooth.

Overall: would just like to state that this beer tastes like overpriced miller light. Also reminds me of moon man with out the strong flavor. stay away unless you like boring beer.

Photo of Oxymoron
2.45/5  rDev -33.4%
look: 2.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 3 | overall: 2

Co-ed Get Naked? Pours a mostly hazy off-lemony yellow color. Some darker highlights like a dirty blond. The head is light with a good pour left a nice head but did quickly dissipate. Although not completely, living a thin line around the edges.

The nose is overall light. Even for style there should be some grainy and malt hints, but really not much depth at all. There is a slight yeasty note but nothing off flavored. Do I smell DMS?

The taste is more definable then the nose. Pale malt flavor with some lighter grainy touches. A sweeter finish then an American lager but light for a blond. There is a spiciness that is light but reminds me of some peppery notes but could be the hops as there really is none that you can speak of. There is a off finish that reminds me of honey beers but the body is bigger so its off setting.

The body is not exactly big but definitely not crisp. The carbonation helps. Overall, rather simple. I know its easy to blame style but really this could be much better.

Photo of lester619
2.48/5  rDev -32.6%
look: 2.5 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 4

Poured into a glass mug, pale yellow color about two inches of foam that doesn't last long. Not very impressive. Clean, grassy, somewhat bitter citrus smells. Not much to the smell. Not much to this beer at all really. I can't say I get this one. There's just not anything to it. I understand the concept, a summer thirst quencher that you keep ice cold and guzzle on a hot day. It does work for that purpose, but so does miller lite. And miller lite doesn't cost nine bucks a six pack. It's a little too much like water for something from a top-of-the-line brewery for the price.

Photo of UWBadgerFan4Life
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of Phyl21ca
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%
look: 2.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2.5

Bottle courtesy of Monger: Poured a golden color beer with a big pure white bubbly head with minimal retention. Aroma of light sweet malt is quite weak with no noticeable hops. Taste is also dominated by sweet malt which at least is pure malt and not some kind of adjunct. Carbonation is medium with a nice body. I understand they wanted to brew something light but this is a bit too light – I suggest sticking to the Yokel if you want a refreshing lager.

Photo of omegaman
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of ShanePB
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of Hallertau
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of Kasie
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of Jaywalsh20
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of Zachtheporter
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of Triste
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of ToddBeans
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

Photo of ElGordito
2.5/5  rDev -32.1%

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Totally Naked from New Glarus Brewing Company
84 out of 100 based on 949 ratings.