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Totally Naked - New Glarus Brewing Company

Not Rated.
Totally NakedTotally Naked

Displayed for educational use only; do not reuse.
BA SCORE
83
good

796 Ratings
THE BROS
98
world-class

(view ratings)
Ratings: 796
Reviews: 265
rAvg: 3.66
pDev: 15.03%
Wants: 28
Gots: 43 | FT: 2
Brewed by:
New Glarus Brewing Company visit their website
Wisconsin, United States

Style | ABV
American Pale Lager |  4.25% ABV

Availability: Rotating

Notes/Commercial Description:
Pure and crisp this is a beer with nothing to hide. Wisconsin two-row barley malt ensures a mellow and smooth body. We imported Noble Hop varieties from Germany and the Czech Republic to ensure a fine mature aroma with no coarse bitterness.

(Beer added by: cokes on 09-24-2002)
Beer: Ratings & Reviews
Sort by:  Latest | High | Low | Top Raters | Read the Alström Bros Beer Reviews and Beer Ratings of Totally Naked Alström Bros
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Ratings: 796 | Reviews: 265 | Display Reviews Only:
Photo of mbrasi
mbrasi

Ohio

1.8/5  rDev -50.8%
look: 3.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 1.5 | feel: 1.5 | overall: 1.5

Pours clear yellow golden with a light white head that dissipates fast. Very clear in glass I can actually see through this brew. I can't remember the last time I drank a beer that I could see through. It actually looks nice on first pour. Aroma is corn and some hops, not too unpleasant. Corn on the flavor, there is something promising in the flavor but it goes away fast..hops. Leaves that nasty watery grain finish in your mouth. I guess this is how a lager is supposed to taste though. Have to get ahold of one of those higher rated beers to know for sure. Not very carbonated and feels like slime in my throat. This is worse than drinking water because it has some flavor in it that I have to wash away using water. Drain pour.

Serving type: bottle

12-21-2008 23:19:47 | More by mbrasi
Photo of ChainChompsky
ChainChompsky

Illinois

2/5  rDev -45.4%

01-15-2014 07:00:42 | More by ChainChompsky
Photo of MillerMan16
MillerMan16

Wisconsin

2/5  rDev -45.4%

07-15-2014 21:36:36 | More by MillerMan16
Photo of bashiba
bashiba

Iowa

2.05/5  rDev -44%
look: 3 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2 | overall: 2

This poured a macro like yellow with a fizzy white head.

The smell had a stale macro quality to it.

The flavor was a bit corny and flat with a light grassy hop finish, very much like a typical mass produced euro pils.

The mouthfeel was watery and thin.

Overall just not real good.

Serving type: bottle

06-01-2009 03:27:24 | More by bashiba
Photo of Winter
Winter

Wisconsin

2.1/5  rDev -42.6%
look: 3 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2

Poured a light golden color. White bubbly head thins but never completely disappears. Aroma is a big turn off, with a slighty pungent, unappealing scent. I coudn't really nail it down. Body is thin with a pleasant crispness. Hardly any after-taste, but something seemed oily. I would not buy this beer again and it's a shame because it's the first New Glarus beer to let me down. New Glarus has such a fine stable of flavorful beers, that Totally Naked leaves you Totally Unimpressed.

Serving type: bottle

11-03-2002 20:40:56 | More by Winter
Photo of scaliasux
scaliasux

Wisconsin

2.15/5  rDev -41.3%
look: 2 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 2

Appearance - Clear, light gold. Bubbly. Thin soapy, white head. Looks like a macrolager.

Smell - Very faint malt and yeast. Pretty hard to detect - even for style.

Taste - Light but rich (a little caramel?) sweet malt flavor. One note, don't really notice any hops. Flavor is more full, and better, than any of the macrobrews. Even so, this is a bit uninspired.

Mouthfeel - Pretty good for a lager. Full and more foamy than bubbly. Not as astringent as many lagers.

Drinkability - I love most of the stuff made by New Glarus. This beer, though, is totally unnecessary. I hope New Glarus sells this stuff to the general public by the truckload, but I don't think I'll be a frequent quaffer.

Serving type: bottle

08-10-2006 02:06:18 | More by scaliasux
Photo of KCM
KCM

Wisconsin

2.25/5  rDev -38.5%

04-11-2012 01:38:43 | More by KCM
Photo of Devilman
Devilman

Illinois

2.25/5  rDev -38.5%

04-27-2013 22:41:41 | More by Devilman
Photo of Huolis72
Huolis72

Wisconsin

2.25/5  rDev -38.5%

12-22-2013 04:34:52 | More by Huolis72
Photo of dt_gbpackersfan
dt_gbpackersfan

Missouri

2.25/5  rDev -38.5%

02-15-2013 22:19:34 | More by dt_gbpackersfan
Photo of Arsenal04
Arsenal04

Minnesota

2.38/5  rDev -35%
look: 3.5 | smell: 3.5 | taste: 2 | feel: 2 | overall: 2

Pours light gold in a Pilsner glass with a very active body full of carbonation and a busy two finger, foamy head that dissipated completely four minutes after pour. Smell is mildly underwhelming, malt and lemon stand out amongst a background of grain - nothing that catches my attention or stands out so far. Taste is malt driven with an aftertaste that reminds me of Michelob Golden Light or any other American-made Lager - coats the throat in a way that makes me think back to nights gone by where I would have far too many beers for my own good. I had a feeling going into rating this beer that with my limited experience in the craft beer world that I would find too many similarities to the standard Lager beers found in the US. Nothing I would go rushing out to get again.

Serving type: bottle

08-14-2009 01:39:33 | More by Arsenal04
Photo of turdinathor
turdinathor

Iowa

2.4/5  rDev -34.4%
look: 2 | smell: 3 | taste: 2 | feel: 4 | overall: 2

Appearance: golden color, No head, bland appearance.

Smell: not a lot of smell, maybe a little fruit but generally weak.

Taste: Boring, watery, bland, bitter

Mouthfeel: crip clean mouthfeel , very smooth.

Overall: would just like to state that this beer tastes like overpriced miller light. Also reminds me of moon man with out the strong flavor. stay away unless you like boring beer.

Serving type: on-tap

04-22-2011 02:24:07 | More by turdinathor
Photo of Oxymoron
Oxymoron

Colorado

2.45/5  rDev -33.1%
look: 2.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 3 | overall: 2

Co-ed Get Naked? Pours a mostly hazy off-lemony yellow color. Some darker highlights like a dirty blond. The head is light with a good pour left a nice head but did quickly dissipate. Although not completely, living a thin line around the edges.

The nose is overall light. Even for style there should be some grainy and malt hints, but really not much depth at all. There is a slight yeasty note but nothing off flavored. Do I smell DMS?

The taste is more definable then the nose. Pale malt flavor with some lighter grainy touches. A sweeter finish then an American lager but light for a blond. There is a spiciness that is light but reminds me of some peppery notes but could be the hops as there really is none that you can speak of. There is a off finish that reminds me of honey beers but the body is bigger so its off setting.

The body is not exactly big but definitely not crisp. The carbonation helps. Overall, rather simple. I know its easy to blame style but really this could be much better.

Serving type: bottle

11-08-2007 23:45:48 | More by Oxymoron
Photo of lester619
lester619

Wisconsin

2.48/5  rDev -32.2%
look: 2.5 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 4

Poured into a glass mug, pale yellow color about two inches of foam that doesn't last long. Not very impressive. Clean, grassy, somewhat bitter citrus smells. Not much to the smell. Not much to this beer at all really. I can't say I get this one. There's just not anything to it. I understand the concept, a summer thirst quencher that you keep ice cold and guzzle on a hot day. It does work for that purpose, but so does miller lite. And miller lite doesn't cost nine bucks a six pack. It's a little too much like water for something from a top-of-the-line brewery for the price.

Serving type: bottle

10-15-2009 19:29:22 | More by lester619
Photo of UWBadgerFan4Life
UWBadgerFan4Life

Wisconsin

2.5/5  rDev -31.7%

10-31-2013 23:58:27 | More by UWBadgerFan4Life
Photo of Phyl21ca
Phyl21ca

Quebec (Canada)

2.5/5  rDev -31.7%
look: 2.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2.5

Bottle courtesy of Monger: Poured a golden color beer with a big pure white bubbly head with minimal retention. Aroma of light sweet malt is quite weak with no noticeable hops. Taste is also dominated by sweet malt which at least is pure malt and not some kind of adjunct. Carbonation is medium with a nice body. I understand they wanted to brew something light but this is a bit too light – I suggest sticking to the Yokel if you want a refreshing lager.

Serving type: bottle

08-15-2007 14:32:07 | More by Phyl21ca
Photo of omegaman
omegaman

Illinois

2.5/5  rDev -31.7%

02-15-2012 18:41:18 | More by omegaman
Photo of Hallertau
Hallertau

Wisconsin

2.5/5  rDev -31.7%

05-18-2013 22:44:43 | More by Hallertau
Photo of Kasie
Kasie


2.5/5  rDev -31.7%

12-23-2012 19:46:12 | More by Kasie
Photo of Zachtheporter
Zachtheporter

Wisconsin

2.5/5  rDev -31.7%

03-02-2012 05:00:14 | More by Zachtheporter
Photo of ToddBeans
ToddBeans

Kentucky

2.5/5  rDev -31.7%

06-18-2014 03:32:12 | More by ToddBeans
Photo of djrn2
djrn2

New Jersey

2.5/5  rDev -31.7%

01-09-2012 20:51:29 | More by djrn2
Photo of Scrumtralecent
Scrumtralecent

Illinois

2.58/5  rDev -29.5%
look: 3 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 3 | overall: 2.5

Poured from a bottle into a pilsner glass.

A - Light light yellow in color with very frothy, airy head. Quite transparent with carbonation bubbles rising upward from the bottom. Quite average.

S - Smell seems a little off to me and these are fresh. Slight hop in there but I have to search for it. Some barley and wheat, but maybe it's the fact that this smell reminds me of BMC products that is turning me off.

T - And...not much. I have to really dig deep to find slight hop, little barley. Very quick crisp taste, with no backend really to speak of.

M - Very light, though I think that was the intent of this one. Some sharp mouthfeel on the cheeks but that quickly fades.

O - This is a really light pilsner and I could see this being a session beer, or beer for a really hot day, but really I need more taste than this. More of really any ingredient. And at 4.25, it's going to take alot of these to get me totally naked.

Serving type: bottle

06-12-2011 05:33:23 | More by Scrumtralecent
Photo of ZAP
ZAP

Minnesota

2.65/5  rDev -27.6%
look: 3.5 | smell: 3 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2.5

Not impressed with this at all....has a slight sour taste and finish...malt lends some slight bready/doughy notes but that's about it...Nose has a light graininess to it...just a bad aftertaste on this...I'll take a Milelr High Life over this any day

Serving type: bottle

06-22-2006 17:47:21 | More by ZAP
Photo of Dotcubed
Dotcubed

Arkansas

2.68/5  rDev -26.8%
look: 4 | smell: 3.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2

So far I've enjoyied the feNew Glarus beers I've had. I'm not really in to the yellow stuff, but everyone starts somewhere. I('ve had a lot of light styles, and I'd like to put this one towards the top if the pile.

Un-dated, so no telling how old the bottle is. It opened with a very satisfying decompression sound. Plesant head, good lace, and awesome bright yellow chrysanthimum color. Plesantly grassy floral smell.

Naked must really mean naked. This beverage has a watery sensation. Sweet beer-like liquid that falls flat. It's sad. I had such high hopes of a delicately hopped "wunder" beer with a balanced malt character. Instead it presents as a watery lager that tastes like it's been on the shelf too long.

Maybe the hopps were too expensive so they used less, maybe they were trying to create an artsy minimalist beer, or maybe the beer is just old. I'll never know. It's totally sad.

Use to deglaze with. Make a nice chicken sauce.

Serving type: bottle

12-17-2007 02:02:29 | More by Dotcubed
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Totally Naked from New Glarus Brewing Company
83 out of 100 based on 796 ratings.