Funny things your BMC friends say when given craft.

Discussion in 'Beer Talk' started by nquigley16, Dec 29, 2012.

  1. Hefewiseman

    Hefewiseman Savant (450) Florida Sep 6, 2011 Beer Trader

    Poured some Heady Topper in a glass for my pops last weekend and he said, "This tastes kinda like Shock Top!"
    I facepalmed.
    Last night on his birthday, I poured him a bottle of Zombie Dust and he goes: "This tastes like Heady Topper?"
    Gettin' closer dad, gettin' closer.
     
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  2. Hastur23

    Hastur23 Savant (335) Pennsylvania Mar 3, 2013 Beer Trader

    My friend, who is partial to Bud Light Lime, after taking a swig of a Marzen:

    "This tastes like a nosebleed."
     
  3. 'I don't like cold coffee.'
     
  4. "This tastes like lawn clippings!"
     
  5. McLandy

    McLandy Disciple (50) Florida Jul 2, 2012

     
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  6. SometimesIfart

    SometimesIfart Advocate (745) Michigan Jun 4, 2012 Beer Trader

    So the aristocratic " Killian's is the best beer ever " guy Made another appearance at my buddies house a few nights ago. He was drinking a Killian's as usual and he stated that " He was in the mood for an IPA ". I had a few Triomphe's with me, So I gave him one. For some reason, He elected to shotgun it. He then continued to tell me about how he would much rather eat black rotten banana's and that it was the wrong kind of IPA. So I asked him what type of IPA he wanted me to give him, To which he replied " A Black Crown ".

    I gave him a nice long uhhhh, I guess you could say " explanation " about how Black Crown is the furthest thing from an IPA and that he would no longer be wasting any of my beer ever again. He then demanded that I compare it to a Killian's. As soon as he handed me the bottle I opened, Took a drink, And said " Mmmmm, Rusty piss ". I poured it down the drain, then left without saying another word.
     
  7. sjverla

    sjverla Advocate (595) Massachusetts Dec 1, 2008 Verified

    My wife, though definitely a drinker of quality beer hasn't developed a taste for much of anything over around 8%. Every time I give her a sip of something like Olde School, BCBS or the like, she generally insists that I don't actually enjoy it.
     
  8. d5001986

    d5001986 Advocate (695) Wisconsin Oct 6, 2012 Beer Trader

    Brought a 6er of Lagunitas A Little Sumpin' Sumpin' to work the other day to share with everyone.

    I received such comments as:
    "Why don't you get me a beer that actually tastes like a beer." and
    "That's a bad beer, it's bitter."

    It was then followed by 3 drainpours.
     
  9. Well said
     
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  10. maximthegreat

    maximthegreat Savant (315) Illinois Feb 13, 2013 Beer Trader

    A friend of mine seemed insulted that I offered him a Sam Adams Oktoberfest. He said, "I only drink pbr because it tastes like American soldiers marching down my throat. It's way better than your fancy import beer." I just face palmed.
     
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  11. ricochet173

    ricochet173 Savant (295) Quebec (Canada) Jul 6, 2011 Beer Trader

    Just because of this, I am going to crack open one of my bottles from 2009.
     
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  12. Cynic-ale

    Cynic-ale Champion (910) Ohio Feb 21, 2013 Beer Trader

    "What was the name of that fucking gasoline?' From adventurous friend that tried DFH 120.

    "That one has fucking hair on it" from same friend after trying Sea Monster Imperial Stout.
     
  13. ricochet173

    ricochet173 Savant (295) Quebec (Canada) Jul 6, 2011 Beer Trader

    I have a solution to everyone in this thread who ends up losing their beers to people who drink pisswater and/or drainpour the good stuff: any time you get the urge to offer your delicious beer to the unappreciative just stop, retract the offer, and send the delicious beer to me. I PROMISE you, I WILL drink the whole thing and enjoy it.
     
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  14. sbxx

    sbxx Advocate (510) Illinois Mar 21, 2011

    Shoulda said, "You like American soldiers in your throat?"
     
  15. This past weekend went out to a nice brewpub with a decent variety of brews that they make themselves. They had their standard lager, a bock, standard ale, strong ale, cream stout, cream ale, and cask-conditioned bitter. My dad orders a Bud on tap (which they don't have) and had to settle for a Coors bottle. Then when my cousin saw my cream stout (which was fairly sweet as far as cream stouts go), he went "I don't like dark beer. They're too bitter".

    That last one made my brain hurt. I tried to explain how that was like saying "I like red cars. They go faster", but was interupted.
     
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  16. BJasny

    BJasny Savant (430) Texas Jul 10, 2011

    "That's the worst thing I've ever tasted. It feels like there's something growing in my mouth" after trying Palate Wrecker
     
  17. RochefortChris

    RochefortChris Champion (845) North Carolina Oct 2, 2012 Beer Trader

    This wasn't a friend but a guy came into where I work today and asked what a DIPA (he pronounced it "deepa") was and was only interested in it because the brewery's name was the same as his last name.
     
    Big_V likes this.
  18. dieBlume

    dieBlume Savant (280) Virginia Mar 18, 2013

    When I was studying abroad in Germany, it was SURPRISINGLY hard to get my female friends to drink beer. After coaxing them for awhile I got them all interested in Erdinger/Franziskaner/Weihenstephaner hefes. The one even moved on to trying dunkels and other beers!
    I got a lot of "This isn't going to be dark is it? I hate dark beers!" Once they got it, the one then tried to compare it to Bud or something. I made her stop talking.

    Just the other day while visiting my mom I had stopped and got a create your own sixer and a bottle of La Terrible. She kept referring to them as "wine" because they were dark in color. "How's your wine?" was what she asked me every time I drank one.
     
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  19. KevSal

    KevSal Advocate (710) California Oct 17, 2010 Beer Trader

    "This is hoppy"

    Drinking a ba stout
     
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  20. "I don't drink dark beer" is the most heard, regardless if what I'm offering is dark or not, haha. Usually I just get laughed at for 'wasting' money on beer.
     
    baconman91 likes this.
  21. lunarbrew

    lunarbrew Savant (495) Wisconsin Mar 11, 2013 Beer Trader

    My dad was afraid to bring good beer to my family thanksgiving, where all my relatives are BMCs. He decided to swing by a liquor store and pickup a 6-pack of his "good beer" anyway. He showed up to my aunt's with Killian's Red.
     
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  22. fearfactory

    fearfactory Advocate (520) Massachusetts Aug 12, 2012 Beer Trader

    "We should play beer drinking games with this!"
     
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  23. Jake1605

    Jake1605 Initiate (0) Missouri Nov 24, 2009

    Semi-related, when the widemouth can came out & when Miller put out the vortex bottle, I showed my friends this thing called a pint glass, then explained & demonstrated the chuggability. Even without clever marketing, a logo & minimal sex appeal, I converted a few. Yeah not really.
     
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  24. baconman91

    baconman91 Advocate (505) Ohio Dec 13, 2009

    ;) I just had a conversation with someone about that. Funny thing..Guinness Draught (the Staple..most folks are talking of) is Actually kind of a "Light" brew -- weighing in @ under 4.5%
     
  25. Jake1605

    Jake1605 Initiate (0) Missouri Nov 24, 2009

    Tell them Guiness has less calories than a Michelob Ultra. Their head will explode.
     
  26. GreesyFizeek

    GreesyFizeek Champion (960) New York Mar 6, 2013 Beer Trader

    "You do realize that Bud Light's cheaper, right?"
     
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  27. Hotmetal1

    Hotmetal1 Advocate (660) Mississippi Feb 28, 2012 Beer Trader

    Hold your nose and try to talk in the voice of a five year with the strongest southern accent you ever heard and say, "You got anymore of that grapefruit beer?" my friend after giving him his first Ruination. He's a Bush light/ Natty light drinker but now loves IPA's as long as they are mine.
     
  28. srogers14

    srogers14 Zealot (80) New Jersey Mar 17, 2013

    It's not a craft at ALL, but I brought a 12 pack of Newcastle to a friend's birthday (it's a cheapie I can drink to get drunk on). Someone else grabbed one out of the cooler and goes "Oh my god, is this MOONSHINE? It's so strong!"
     
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  29. My brother tried one on my SNPA's and said "This is really strong beer". To give him credit he drank to the last drop.
     
  30. Cvescalante

    Cvescalante Savant (470) Texas Dec 24, 2012 Beer Trader

    My favorite is "That doesn't even taste like beer"
     
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  31. Which is always drag, when it explodes over misinformation ;)

    Most sources have Guinness Draught with 125 calories for 12 oz., and the 12 oz. bottle Michelob Ultra's label says 95 calories.
     
  32. Jake1605

    Jake1605 Initiate (0) Missouri Nov 24, 2009

    I read this somewhere or heard it at a conference. It may have been Bud Light, but I thought it was Michelob Ultra. Are you sure the information wasn't for the Guinness Draft can (16oz.)?
     
  33. BrewSTL

    BrewSTL Savant (350) Missouri Mar 14, 2013

    "Do you have any regular beer?"
     
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  34. DerekMorgan

    DerekMorgan Savant (465) Massachusetts Jan 15, 2013 Beer Trader

    Friend of mine does that all the time. She tries to like beer but just refers to everything as hoppy because she doesn't know any other beer terms. It's brutal.
     
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  35. "IPA is that the stuff that tastes like tree bark?"
     
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  36. baconman91

    baconman91 Advocate (505) Ohio Dec 13, 2009

    ..I Love this one: What's an "Ipa" beer ?
    (as a word..instead of I.P.A)
     
    seakayak likes this.
  37. convinced my friend to buy a sixer of two hearted to which he said "this is the most dog shit tasting thing ive ever drank". last time i was at his house he had a Woodchuck sampler. Also, his dad drank the other 5 in one night and said "this is the only IPA i've had that i liked" What his dad says isnt funny what's funny is his dad drank all of them cause he couldnt deal.
     
  38. Also gave a dude a sierra torpedo, he made a face for at least 12 minutes.
     
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  39. "This cost how much?"
     
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  40. Bonis

    Bonis Advocate (565) Ohio Jul 28, 2010

    After offering an acquaintance to try Columbus IPA, he simply gagged and started coughing. Man that stuff is potent.
     
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