Have you ever met someone who drinks Guinness exclusively? They belong in the same insane asylum as people who buy nothing but Apple products. The other day, after the gym, I was looking for a place to sit down and have a beer before my girl got off work. I went to Boston's Pizza because it was nearby and they have some okay beers on tap. The bar was pretty empty except for an older couple watching the game, and I took a spot near the end and ordered a Lagunitas IPA. A guy sat down next to me, older, heavyset, wearing a baseball cap with a shamrock on it. And he looked like a talker. I heard him grunt in distress over something. Then I felt his face looking at me. He said, "Can you believe that?" pointing at a small Guinness poster advertising a Black and Tan. I told him, "Yeah, I don't like to mix my beers either. I can't believe a brewery would encourage it." I thought, hey, theres nobody else here to talk to and this guy probably knows a thing or two about good beer. I never find people I can talk about beer with. Then he ordered 5 Guinness stouts. Holy crap, he's buying a round for everyone. Or so I thought. Then he told me "That way, if happy hour is almost over, your drinks are already in the system." Nevermind that happy hour was over at 7 and it was only 5:30. This guy only had an hour and a half to get his drinks in. I asked him, "So you must really like Guinness, huh?" That was my first mistake. He went on a long tangent about how what you could drink is determined by your ethnic decent, and since he was part Irish, he was naturally able to drink Guinness. I was bored, so I decided to push all his buttons. I told him American Guinness tasted like water. He explained that was because of how it was poured when I had it, and it tastes completely different when the bartender does the "perfect pour." Then he called over the bartender and told her that his Guinness did not taste right because she did not pour it correctly. They went back and forth, and ultimately, he did not get a free drink out of it. Then he told me that my beer was actually watered down compared to his Guinness. I said, "Laguintas is pretty watered down for an IPA. It pretty much has the minimum legal amount of hops and alcohol to be considered an IPA. Still, it is an IPA and it is a more substantial beer than Guinness in spite of being lighter in color. Yours, however, is not a stout. The only Guinness Stout I have ever had was Foreign Extra and it was good. Then he explained how nitro tap is superior and how in Ireland, that is how they serve Guinness, and that if you need a stronger or hoppier beer, your taste buds are just craving more of a certain thing and cannot appreciate a refined beverage. I took my check and bid adieu. His next Guinness was not a perfect pour either.