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Tetley's Smoothflow | Carlsberg-Tetley Brewing Ltd

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Tetley's SmoothflowTetley's Smoothflow
BA SCORE
3.21/5
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117 Ratings
Tetley's SmoothflowTetley's Smoothflow
BEER INFO

Brewed by:
Carlsberg-Tetley Brewing Ltd
England, United Kingdom
carlsberg.com.my

Style: English Bitter

Alcohol by volume (ABV): 3.60%

Availability: Year-round

Notes / Commercial Description:
None provided.

BEER STATS
Ranking:
#44,439
Reviews:
55
Ratings:
117
pDev:
16.82%
 
 
Wants:
5
Gots:
15
Trade:
0
HISTOGRAM
 
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User Ratings & Reviews
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Ratings: 117 |  Reviews: 55
Reviews by Garrett092112:
Photo of Garrett092112
4/5  rDev +24.6%

More User Reviews:
Photo of jjboesen
3.5/5  rDev +9%

Photo of cichief
3.18/5  rDev -0.9%
look: 3.5 | smell: 3 | taste: 3 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3.5

Poured from a can with a widget into an Imperial Pint glass.

A- Poured a deep amber with nice cascading, the head was very creamy, tan in color.

S- Some subtle malt, a little toastiness, but very muted.

T- The taste was also muted from what I've tasted on tap, a little toasted malt coming through, little hops on the tongue.

M- Very smooth, and creamy, thanks to the nitrogen, medium body.

D- Very drinkable, but better on tap.

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Photo of GreenCard
2.26/5  rDev -29.6%
look: 3 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 3 | overall: 2.5

Appearance: light brown, good clarity, one finger of off-white creamy foam, great head retention

Aroma: crackers, biscuity sweetness, hint of butterscotch, herbally hops

Flavor: dry malt backbone, fair amount of tanginess, a bit "extracty" in the hop flavor and bitterness, finishes dryish with a tangy aftertaste and some caramel

Mouthfeel: medium-light body, creamy texture, low carbonation

Other comments: What can I say? It's a nitro-can. I hope no CAMRA members spot the fact that I drank a nitro-can and revoke my membership!

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Photo of SteveP
2.33/5  rDev -27.4%
look: 3 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2.5

Drunk from a nitro-keg at The Hope Pole - Somewhere in the hop fields of Kent. Walnut and vanilla flavour. Mild hop bitterness.

Drunk again from a nitro-keg at a Sports Bar in Portsmouth during the match with Man Utd. Portsmouth winning 2 - 0!

This is really a gently drinkable beer of very little character. The nitro softens everything to a gentle almost tasteless foam. All in all it's a laid back beer with a pleasant enough vanilla caramel flavour. Not a quality drink, but nothing revolting about it.

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Photo of joecast
3.41/5  rDev +6.2%
look: 4 | smell: 3 | taste: 3.5 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 4

settles to a clear amber colored beer with a stable off-white 1cm thick head. standard nitro-can stuff, but it looks good.
light malty sweet aroma. some floral hops as well, but both are fairly subdued.
a good bit of bitterness quickly cuts any lingering sweetness from the malt. finishes quite cleanly, leaving very little behind.
would have to say the mouthfeel is a bit on the light side, but not extremely so.
overall, not a bad bitter. highly drinkable and no real low points.

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Photo of woodychandler
3.96/5  rDev +23.4%
look: 4.5 | smell: 3.5 | taste: 4 | feel: 4.5 | overall: 4

You've probably heard the one about the guy who walks into a bar. No? He says, "Ouch!" Bro. Woody went to Ardmore last Saturday to see what he could see and walked into a bottle shop. He said, "Yay! Look at all of these new CANs in furtherance of The CANQuest (TM)!" It is called The Beer Shoppe in Ardmore Plaza and for those that do not live in PA, you have no idea what a rare bird it is to find a quality bottle shop, especially one that provided me with no less than five (5) new CANned beers on my first visit. This is one of those beers.

From the CAN: "Light English Ale"; "A uniquely smooth taste: For best results; Serve cold from the fridge, pull the tab, listen to the surge & pour down the side of the glass in one smooth movement."

The Crack immediately caused The Surge, a massive off-gassing of what I assume to be N2. It is always good to read directions and I followed theirs to the letter. I employed a gentle Glug, running the beer down the side of the tilted glass, where it began a beautiful cascade upon arrival at the bottom. I was left with a dense, thick finger of tawny head head with excellent retention. Color was a deep coppery-amber with NE-quality clarity. Nose had a pleasant biscuit malt quality. Mouthfeel was full and creamy thanks to the N2 presence. It was light in its flavor, a biscuit/cracker-like semi-sweetness, but still quite pleasant. Finish was likewise semi-sweet with the maltiness lingering well after the swallow. The low ABV makes it a sessionable CANdidate by even Ding's standards, but I am afraid that as a hophead, I would need more bitterness to sustain me.

 1,616 characters

Photo of lacqueredmouse
3.7/5  rDev +15.3%
look: 4 | smell: 4 | taste: 3.5 | feel: 4 | overall: 3.5

Served out of a wonderfully widgeted big English can.

Pinkish copper body, with a slightly pink-tinged dense creamy head. Good lacing sticks to the glass all the way down.

Good toasted, roasted malt aromas on the nose, with a light hint of fragrant citrus, which increases the flavour.

Creamy, rich coating palate. Roasted notes dominate the flavour, finishing dry and astringest, and ultimately refreshing.

A very drinkable and enjoyable brew.

 456 characters

Photo of mynie
2.15/5  rDev -33%
look: 2 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 2

Being a smooth operator, I figured this beer would be right up my alley. Golly, was I ever wrong!

It tastes like nitrogen and water. There is no expiry date, but I'm not familiar with any beer or beer-like ingredients that completely vanish after a beer expires. As it warms up, the tiniest bit of hop bitterness is present near the end, along with the big old woosh of nitrogen.

This is one of the least flavorful beers I've ever had, right up there with Coors light. This review is therefore sparse, as I just don't have all much to say. It's not awful, certainly, as being awful would require some flavor of some sort. It's just hardly even there.

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Photo of ChainGangGuy
2.82/5  rDev -12.1%
look: 4.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3

440ml nitro-can - $2.79 at Total Wine & More in Kennesaw, Georgia.

Appearance: Pours a clear, amber-tan body with a tall, dense, creamy, off-white head.

Smell: This one smells like cold tea with a barley backing and lightly sweetened with table sugar.

Taste: Incredibly mild hint of gently toasted barley grain. Scantly nutty. Low sweetness. Herbal, earthy hops with very light, understated bitterness. Dry, soft finish.

Mouthfeel: Medium-thin body. Low carbonation, though a smooth body.

Overall: Tetley's Smoothflow tastes alot like chilled Tetley tea.

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Photo of plaid75
3.41/5  rDev +6.2%
look: 4 | smell: 3 | taste: 3.5 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3.5

On nitro at The Atlantic Chip Shop, Brooklyn, NYC.

Poured a medium copper hue with a two finger frothy white head. There was very god retention and good lacing.

The smell was mostly absent with a touch of caramel.

The taste was equally benign with a doughy malt and cleansing hop.

The mouthfeel was full on nitro.

Overall a decent nitro ale.

 350 characters

Photo of dgherm
3.23/5  rDev +0.6%
look: 3.5 | smell: 3 | taste: 3.25 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3.25

Photo of biegaman
3.01/5  rDev -6.2%
look: 4 | smell: 3 | taste: 3 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 3

Tetley's Smooth Flow pours with both sound effects and spectacle. The nitro-can sounds a loud, cracking siren and then gears up for what appears a magic trick: thousands of tiny bubbles synchronized into dance, looping and dipping, swarming up the glass like a flock of starlings under attack. In biology this phenomena is known as 'allelomimesis'; in layperson terms it's called 'cool'. And it results in a bed of head that could literally serve as a bed!

The brilliantly copper beer looks maltier than it smells. It's slim-pickings for the olfactory bulb. Maybe it's that thick sponge atop that's preventing any aromas from leaking out, or maybe the people brewing this just don't want to shell out for decent ingredients, but whatever the case this aroma is lackluster, to put it politely. Aside from the water minerals and a hint of honeycomb toffee, it ain't got much going on.

Tastes of biscuits and toffee are frustratingly vague. It seems oxidized. There is a teaspoon of the most pasteurized, mass-produced honey on the market, but it fails to result in any kind of redeeming sweetness. The minerals are easily the most noted component; it tastes (somewhat distastefully) as if the last thing to pass over the tongue is a handful of old pennies.

If you need rain, plan a parade and then invite liquid nitrogen. In my experience, the silly little 'widget' is responsible for ruining everything from aroma to flavour to texture. This particular offering suffers foremost from a deterioration of texture; the mouthfeel is dry and stale like cardboard and leaves a soapy remnant. Both bitterness and sweetness alike are nullified.

Tetley's was once the embodiment of real ale. Now, it is nothing more than a damaging testimony to the state of beer in England. The fact that an ale so insipid and uninspired can be a top-ten selling brand does not speak highly of British palates. However, I will concede that, insofar as mass-produced beers go, one could do much worse. That is in no way an endorsement, but it is about the most positive thing I can say.

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Photo of mintjellie
3.44/5  rDev +7.2%
look: 4 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 3.5 | feel: 4 | overall: 4

Poured from nitro-can into a Marston's pint glass. I love watching it settle. Generous off-white head with great retention over a copper body. Colour reminds me an old penny. Sporadic lace.

Hints of fruit and caramel. Doesn't seem to be a whole lot to pick up here.

Caramel, crackers, and fruit. Very mild bitterness in the finish. Simple, but also really clean.

Light body with a creamy head, almost flat carbonation. Very smooth and creamy without any heaviness. This and it's pleasant but simple flavour profile make it really easy to drink. A clean tasting brew at such low ABV is extremely sessionable.

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Photo of thehyperduck
3.23/5  rDev +0.6%
look: 4.25 | smell: 3 | taste: 3 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3.5

440 mL can picked up at The Beer Store; best before Oct. 4 2014.

Pours a clear copper-amber colour, topped with the usual nifty cascading, creamy white head typical of nitro beers. It's about one finger thick at first, with good retention as it takes quite a while to thin out. A beautiful-looking beer, really - too bad I can't say anything nearly as positive about the aroma. Leafy notes come through, with some sponge toffee sweetness and not much else besides mineral water. I guess aromas don't get much cleaner than this, but for the most part it's just empty.

While I'm at it, the flavour is similarly weak and uninspired - although I'll append to that statement, that it tastes at the very least, agreeable. Sponge toffee and red apples make up the bulk of the flavour, with some honey sweetness and a vaguely leafy, bittersweet finish that has a touch of metallicity. Light-bodied, with a flat, watery mouthfeel - while I do appreciate the silky smooth feel on the palate, when combined with the weak flavour it just gives me the impression of a lazy, forgettable English ale.

Final Grade: 3.23, a C+. Tetley's Smoothflow isn't the worst nitro beer I've ever had, but it's definitely not the best, either. This is a mediocre English bitter/pale ale, with no real strong points to counter the typical weak points of this style of beer (weak aroma, mild flavour and flat mouthfeel). At $2.50 a can (and only available in four packs), this isn't something I anticipate I'll be returning to at any point in the near future - it reminds me a little of Boddington's, in that both are proof-positive that imported ales can be every bit as dull and lifeless as macro lagers.

 1,679 characters

Photo of BlackHaddock
2.96/5  rDev -7.8%
look: 4 | smell: 3 | taste: 2.75 | feel: 3 | overall: 3

Two half-pints in Blackfriers Theatre (Boston, Lincolnshire) before and at half-time during 'Sleeping Beauty' by The Vienna Festival Ballet on 31 Mar 2013.

Dark amber body with a full creamy head that stayed the distance on both halves. It looked pretty good to be honest.

Too cold to have an aroma at first, as it warmed a malty molasses and mixed dark fruits smell began to appear.

The taste took its time to arrive because of the coldness, but it turns out the beer is slightly malty and semi-sweet throughout. Fairly smooth in texture as the name suggests, although I think smoothbland rather than smoothflow would suit it more.

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Photo of metter98
3.31/5  rDev +3.1%
look: 4 | smell: 3 | taste: 3 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 4

A: The beer is clear yellowish amber in color and has an ever so slight amount of visible carbonation. It poured with a finger high creamy and dense off white head that has excellent retention properties and consistently left a short head covering the surface and a thick coating of bubbles running down the sides of the glass.
S: Very slight aromas of toasted malts are present in the nose.
T: The taste is similar to the smell but is a bit stronger and also has some notes of tea leaves and slight hints of bitterness.
M: It feels light-bodied and a little smooth and thin on the palate with a low to moderate amount of carbonation.
O: This beer is quite sessionable; I would have no problem drinking this beer all night long. The smell and taste could be a little stronger, but the mouthfeel from the nitro-can helps to keep things a little interesting.

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Photo of pin
2.5/5  rDev -22.1%

Photo of Bouleboubier
3.43/5  rDev +6.9%
look: 4.25 | smell: 3.75 | taste: 3.25 | feel: 3.25 | overall: 3.25

A: typical picturesque nitro - perfect 1/2" tight, dense-creamy foam.... cascade effect on pour... crystal-clear, amber liquid.... big sheets of lace

S: super-fruity - a lightly-spicy apple... some moderately potent syrupy malt.... surprising amount of aroma, considering the serving

T: standard, somewhat bland nitro-can bitter flavor... nothing distinctive.... clean, mellow pale malts drenched in apple-skin esters with a little tail of earthy hop flavor and bitterness.... bit of a minerally taste through.... everything just washes down with only a mild aftertaste of bitter fruit skin

M: very light and smooth, like soft water... little to no sensation of carbonation on the palate

O: don't expect much from something like this though, once again, it's funny how something like Boddington's manages to stand out in the crowd

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Photo of Spikester
3.86/5  rDev +20.2%
look: 4 | smell: 3 | taste: 4 | feel: 3 | overall: 5

Pours amber with a one inch off white head that lasts all the way down. Fair amount of lacings. Smell is grains and malt. Taste is malty with a fair amount of bitter hops. Mouthfeel is quite good. Creamy with minimal carbonation. Fair imitation of a pub pull. Drinkability is awesome. At 3.6%abv this is the original session pub ale.

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Photo of malibujohnny
3.52/5  rDev +9.7%
look: 3.5 | smell: 4 | taste: 3 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 4.5

this brew pours very well into my pint glass.A very nice light golden color with a very creamy head that sticks around the whole way down.This beer is a low to medium body,as for mouthfeel i thought it was rather watered down but went down smooth.Great flavor overall but the wateryness takes a little away from the malt.finishes slightly dry.Very drinkable beer,i enjoy this brew and recommend to all.

 402 characters

Photo of callmemickey
3.9/5  rDev +21.5%
look: 4 | smell: 4 | taste: 4 | feel: 4 | overall: 3.5

A: Dark golden amber... with a healthy off white head that lasts...

S: Sweet malts with slight citrus hop hints

T: Rich toasted malts are strong and everpresent... the citrus hops in the nose are also present here in the crisp finish

M: Rich, thick and creamy... this is super smooth (hence the name)

D: A bit thick for more than two or three before feeling the need to switch to something less rich and shakelike

enjoyed it at a Saracens rugby match on vacation

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Photo of Biscuit033
3.53/5  rDev +10%
look: 4 | smell: 3.5 | taste: 3.5 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3.5

A; Clear, light cooper with one finger head and great retention.

S: Hoppy and metallic (like iron), with a definate fruitiness.

T: Malty with very faint hops and watery. There is a irony-water taste to this but it doesn't bring a ton of hop flavor with it if much.

M: Vey light but creamy. Feels too watery though.

D: Not a terrible beer and one that Icould drink plenty. But there are a lot of other beers that could replace this one on the next round.

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Photo of hoegaardenhero
2.99/5  rDev -6.9%
look: 4 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 3 | feel: 3.5 | overall: 3

a: i love nitrous cans; pours great thick white head with dark slightly murky brown body leaves a solid white sheet of lace covering the glass

s: pretty sharp sweet malt overtone with toffee; slightest hint of hoppy bitterness; not a particularly strong scent

t: a strong menthol-like flavor with hints of malty sweetness

m: creamy and thick with very little carbonation; very english

d: the menthol flavor is quite weird but on a hot day it could be a pretty quenching ale; i suppose you could say it is the newport of beers

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Photo of sliverX
3.5/5  rDev +9%

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Tetley's Smoothflow from Carlsberg-Tetley Brewing Ltd
Beer rating: 3.21 out of 5 with 117 ratings