SWTFYW Hints and Hauls!!!

How many owls does it take to change a lightbulb?

It doesn't matter, when you tell them to do it they'll just ask "who?"

 

If Russia were to invade Turkey from behind, do you think Greece would help?

 

I'm not proud to admit that I spent a minute and a half thinking this was a World Cup reference...

 

A family walks into a bar to meet a talent agent. He starts telling his agent about the act his family does. "But wait," he says "better yet, we'll show you" and then [Content removed by moderator.] "The Aristocrats!"

 

1) a guy named @Houser walks into a bar, bartender says, put some clothes on man!

2) how many SWTFYW'ers does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, they'll drink a bunch of beer and it'll never get done.

3) why did I cross the road? to see if the shock collar worked (true story, it worked well...I didn't make it far across the road)

 

If you had a video of number 3 I'd declare you the winner right now.

 

A friend of mine recorded it on his phone...probably still has it lol.

 

Why did tertullian cross the road? Because his girlfriend broke up with him and he lost his job and he's moving and he's broke right now and I mean it's a long story but he plans to pay you back seriously Jarod.

 

A monkey, a blonde, a priest and and Santa Claus walk into a bar. I forget the rest of the story, but your mom's a *****.

 

Why did a SWTFYWer cross the road?

Because @Ol_Johnny_Skippelwicky got pissed and sent a pack of motherfukin ravenous wolf spiders on his ass for shipping more than 4 bottles.

 

Thanks @anticipation23!! Very generous psuedoSue box... I was planning on getting your address from the shipping label to return the favor, then I realized I used my own address as the return... I'll figure out a way to get you back though.

444th hint #squid: My box went out today and should have no problem arriving before the 4th.
hint #octopus: Make sure you don't let this box languish on your porch very long, at least one item within should be refrigerated immediately.
hint #cephalopod: I hope you like locals.

 

444th BIF hint: been slacking on this since I've been super busy but my target and I have some history together, more so with him sending to me than me sending to him. But I plan to repay in full.

 

Wicked weed is damn good. Green Man's sour game though... Damn.

 

2 blondes go waking in the woods and stumble upon a pair of tracks. One argues that it's a pair of deer tracks. The other argues that they're rabbit tracks. 5 minutes later they were hit by a train.

 

That's not traditional framework but got to admit I laughed. Cheers!

 

FTFY

 

WICKED WEED LIF Part 2/twist:

If you win you can choose someone who you think should get a box by whatever criteria you so choose, and they will get a box (perhaps without Wicked Weed) as well. I would prefer some assistance if sending to Alaska but happy to do so! (Saying that only bc never shipped there...if I can handle, will do so)

 

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two but they have to be real small....

 

ammit, my favorite

 

so Lansdale berfwst wirh @Houser and @neesarebad left my glasses and phone at friends house good times good times!!!@