Funny things your BMC friends say when given craft.

"This taste like big foot's dick"

 

Bravo!

 

Had a few friends try a Fore Smoked Stout. One actually liked it and said it tastes like burnt bacon ( He's the one who typically enjoys any beer given to him ) Had another one say it tasted like somebody puked up Guinness, filtered out the chunks and put it into the bottle ( He's the one who only drinks Bud Light Lime, Or a six-pack of Two Hearted over the course of a month when he's feeling brave ). The third thought it tasted like, and I quote " Licking the inside of Howard Stern's asshole and eating his dingleberries ".

 

I just gave my friend a small pour of Parabola 2011 and told him to sip it. He took a sip, let it sit in his mouth, then made the nastiest face Ive seen in a while. "This tastes like donkey piss. I'll take a corona or coors light any day." I've been laughing all night.

 

Can I get a water also

 

Split a Zombie Dust with my dad... "holy wah... this tastes like stomach bile! I wish I could get in to this stuff with you but I just can't!"

A few days later split a BBPt5 with my uncle "Oh yeah Eddie... this is good stuff..." as his mouth is watering and his face shows clear disgust. Guess you can't blame the two for trying to show interest anyways!

 

i gave my buddy a founders porter and he told me it taste like guiness. my beer spewed out my nose in laughter. plz man stop! hahaha

 

I'm new to BA and the craft beer world but the one time I brought a mix-six to a party instead of drinking the bud light keg people looked at me like I was snooty. The next time we had a get together, people immediately pegged me as the guy that drinks, and I quote, "Weird fancy beers". How the hell is Redhook fancy?

 

I was at a college bar with a good bottle selection and Old Rasputin was their weekly special. I order one and the (slightly inebriated) friend next to me says "i'll have what he's having". I warn her saying she probably wont like it, as she is holding a Coors Light and I tell her it's a lot different than what she's drinking, she replies "beer is beer". We get the Rasputins, and she takes one sip and nearly vomits, then says "thats the worst beer i've ever tasted, it's like dirt" and gives hers to me, which I then hand off to another friend of mine who drinks craft.

 

On two occassions different people have told me a craft beer tastes like dirty feet, and for completely different beers. One time was Victory's Golden Monkey and the other time was some IPA I can't remember.

 

There is a ladder that has to be climbed when getting into craft beer. Your palate needs to develop and refine in order to appreciate great beers; just like wine, whiskey, or vegetables. Price is another barrier that people struggle to get through. "Why would I get 6 beers when I can get 12 for the same price?"

These people can't be blamed for their sad, sad ignorance. What we can do is start them at the bottom of the ladder with Belgian whites, wheat beers, and saisons. Throwing an IPA or Imperial stout at someone who has never had one is asking for trouble.

 

Drinking Golden Money is like having large breast on your face. . . It's great.

 

Or for hilarious results.

 

I've probably heard that one the most. They usually understand better when I dumb-it-down that the beer I'm drinking is typically a good deal stronger abv-wise than their BMC (ie "one of these is equal to two Bud Lights"). All of a sudden their tone changes a bit, lol.

 

I like how ~half of these are 'Your beer is too bitter/dark for me to handle' and the other ~half are 'You drink sissy beer.'

 

Yep. See that all the time around here.

 

"I am the master of my own destiny. Please leave me to it, and you worry about your own beer"

/truer words have never been spoken
//these threads are the worst

 

My mom isn't really a beer drinker but she likes to taste the beers I drink. I just gave her a taste of a Ranger IPA from New Belgium and her exact words were, "Fuck! This tastes like fucking horse piss!"

 

"I like that; it's really good. But I just want a PBR right now."

 

I think some IPA does taste spicy. Victory Hop Devil comes to mind first.

Enjoy