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Bottle Share Etiquette

Discussion in 'Beer Talk' started by Siggy125, Jan 24, 2013.

  1. Beerverage

    Beerverage Initiate (0) Dec 8, 2010 North Carolina
    Beer Trader

    I often bring more than I plan on actually opening to a bottle share and open the ones that most people haven't had or want to try. Not yours don't open it. Simple. However I unfortunately have had much of my beer drank at my house without me by douchbag roommates. Most recently a 2008 panepot (sp?) reserva that he won't fess up to drinking. I want to live by myself so bad.

    To clarify the worst damage was done by one person who no longer lives with me and the reserva when I asked him about it he said he drank a brown Sugga so it could have ment to drink a Sugga but grabbed the reserva.
  2. dmwcpa

    dmwcpa Initiate (160) Apr 24, 2008 North Carolina

    Well our group must be different from most. We meet monthly (for the past three years) and if the bottle is on the counter or in one of the tubs of ice it is there for who ever wants to open it.
    riverlen likes this.
  3. Gannon81

    Gannon81 Initiate (0) Jan 5, 2012 Oregon

    It's already been said, I think it's more a matter of principle. Borderline theft for those that recognize a time and place for certain beers to be shared. And considering what ever it cost to amass the particular brews the owner brought to the table, I say it's definitely an ill-advised gesture worth confronting, calmly or otherwise...a personal judgement call.
  4. rozzom

    rozzom Defender (614) Jan 22, 2011 New York
    Beer Trader

    When I read the OP, I couldn't imagine there being two sides to this thread. I was wrong.
    AdmiralOzone and Hanzo like this.
  5. fredmugs

    fredmugs Poo-Bah (1,530) Aug 11, 2012 Indiana
    Beer Trader

    Not anymore. No more getting credit or being special. Every kid gets a medal.
  6. glitchedmind

    glitchedmind Initiate (0) May 8, 2012 California

    Simple rules:
    You don't bang another man's wife.
    You don't touch another man's balls.
    You don't open another man's beer.

    (There's exceptions to the above rules, such as permission granted, but frankly that's rare)
  7. MinnesotaMoon

    MinnesotaMoon Initiate (0) Jan 15, 2013 Minnesota

    depends on the situation, but a general rule: either you have a designated pourer or you open/pour what you brought so you have a chance to intro the beer to everyone
  8. misterid

    misterid Initiate (0) Apr 3, 2009 Wisconsin

    this happened to me with a bottle at the CW release party maybe 2 years ago

    shit ton of bottles on a table.. girl i was with said she wanted to try it.. i grabbed it and popped the cork. bricks were shit. nobody said anything directly to me but i got the hairy eyeball... whomever brought the bottle didn't say anything to me. either they weren't in the room at the time or they didn't care.

    the fuck, it's beer, on a table, with dozens of people in the room cracking bottle after bottle. i didn't fly in to a rage when the beers i brought were opened randomly. that's the spirit of the thing. bring beers that you have had for others to try.

    different situation if it's a bottle in your possession (in a bag, whatever) and someone you don't know pops the top to pass out to others who you don't know.
  9. VncentLIFE

    VncentLIFE Meyvn (1,417) Feb 16, 2011 North Carolina
    Beer Trader

    We always went by the "do you want to open this now" or "do you want to open something?" I always like acknowledging who brought it that way.
    bryanole27 likes this.
  10. WickedSluggy

    WickedSluggy Devotee (400) Nov 21, 2008 Texas
    Beer Trader

    If the party is BYO then you shouldn't drink someone elses beer even if it is in a cooler in the middle of the room. If the party's host is supplying beer, you should not add your stock to their cooler. People can't be expected to tell the difference between your beer and "house" beer.
    SatlyMalty likes this.
  11. Chinon01

    Chinon01 Initiate (0) Jan 23, 2007 Pennsylvania

    Totally unrelated but a few years ago I brought a Victory mixed case to a family picnic. I watched my cousin's GF pop a Storm King (she had no clue) take a sip make a face and immediately drop it into the trash. I retrieved said bottle of Storm King poured it into a cup and drank it. Would you call a violation on either party?
    gueuzegeek likes this.
  12. geocool

    geocool Initiate (175) Jun 21, 2006 Massachusetts

    Rich relations give
    Crust of bread and such
    You can help yourself
    But don't take too much
    Mama may have, Papa may have
    But God bless the child that's got his own
    That's got his own
    beerindaglass and alysmith4 like this.
  13. UCLABrewN84

    UCLABrewN84 Poo-Bah (12,188) Mar 18, 2010 California

    This right here is worse than someone just opening a bottle that is not theirs.
  14. UCLABrewN84

    UCLABrewN84 Poo-Bah (12,188) Mar 18, 2010 California

    Dude, you missed seeing Dr. Bill pouring a Jereboam of Double Bastard one handed.
  15. JayS2629

    JayS2629 Initiate (0) Oct 23, 2010 Alabama

    I agree with everyone about this being common sense to only open what you bring. However, more people are lacking in common sense than those that possess it. I think if a bottle sharing is set up that the host should have it organized and make any rules clear to all participants.
  16. EddieGold

    EddieGold Initiate (0) Nov 22, 2012 North Carolina

    this is so fucking stupid, bottle share etiquette? this should be implied, you know, someting you learn when your a kid... respect for other people. it says a lot about someone, also why would you start a thread asking such a stupid question?
    joeseppy and tyrsis like this.
  17. MarkyMOD

    MarkyMOD Meyvn (1,136) Apr 5, 2012 Colorado
    Beer Trader

    The person who brought the bottle opens it to assure they get a pour, and because you brought it it is yours... Unless you leave of course.
  18. gueuzegeek

    gueuzegeek Initiate (0) Aug 11, 2003 New Jersey

    I am so glad we don't have that "management pours" style tasting!! I actually tend to pour SMALLER pours than other people might, which brings me to:

    TIP number 2 for newbees: Be mindful of the fact that some bottles are only 12 ounces and may be really in demand. Keep your sample pours to just that, samples. Look around and see how the veterans are pouring and follow their lead.
  19. gueuzegeek

    gueuzegeek Initiate (0) Aug 11, 2003 New Jersey

  20. Siggy125

    Siggy125 Devotee (453) Nov 10, 2006 California
    Beer Trader

    I ask the question 'cuz I was anxious to hear other perspectives. Isn't that what these forums are for? Since there have been varying responses over the last couple of days, it doesn't appear to have been such a stupid question.

    Now, run along and spew on someone else's thread, (or not).
    AdmiralOzone likes this.
  21. geocool

    geocool Initiate (175) Jun 21, 2006 Massachusetts

    It's nice to meet someone so expert in the art of "respect for other people" that they are free to call others "fucking stupid" and "asking such a stupid question."
  22. EddieGold

    EddieGold Initiate (0) Nov 22, 2012 North Carolina

    Thank you, nice to meet you too.
  23. EddieGold

    EddieGold Initiate (0) Nov 22, 2012 North Carolina

    what was the point of you quoting what i said if you arent going to do it right? i never said he was Fucking stupid, and its my opinion if i think its a stupid question.
  24. Earlycsquid

    Earlycsquid Zealot (533) Jan 7, 2013 California
    Beer Trader

    I mean, it's not THAT difficult to say "Hey, who brought this? And can we open it up?"

    I generally like to not be that one guy who is five steps ahead of everyone else in terms of drinking the beer. So I have no problem just working on what's in front of you without looking ahead to the future.
  25. dbfp210

    dbfp210 Initiate (0) Jun 27, 2012 Pennsylvania

    You took a beer out of the trash. A beer you can find anywhere and I'm guessing you had 5 more if it was a mixed case. Bit weird, but hey, it's not my beer.
  26. tlh1005

    tlh1005 Initiate (0) Oct 1, 2009 North Carolina
    Beer Trader

    For me I would think it depended on who I was with and what the beer was. I would never just open someone else's beer, that said, if it was common and expected I probably wouldn't care.

    There is one scenario I would be p1ssed about however. Sometimes I bring beer to share with people and am not sure what I want to open so I usually have more than what I really want to open. I'd be a little p1ssed if I wasn't feeling it was the right time and place for one of the bottles and it just got arbitrarily opened.
  27. Highbrow

    Highbrow Devotee (454) Jan 7, 2011 California
    Beer Trader

    maybe the guilty party thought it was a 'bottle grab' as opposed to an organized bottle share? seriously though - main thing to focus on is did everyone manage to have a good time?
  28. Chinon01

    Chinon01 Initiate (0) Jan 23, 2007 Pennsylvania

    So if it were a rarer beer it would have been ok?
  29. Earlycsquid

    Earlycsquid Zealot (533) Jan 7, 2013 California
    Beer Trader

    The only thing weird is that he didn't slap the lack-of-taste out of his cousin's gf's mouth. How dare she waste a beer like that. If you pop open a bottle and it's not your bag, who the hell drain pours it without properly asking around if anyone wanted to finish it?

    That's correct manners. You don't just throw away beer, man.
  30. Timmush

    Timmush Aspirant (292) Jan 5, 2008 New Jersey
    Beer Trader

    If you dont want it to be open, then don't bring it.
    If a bottle is open at a bottle share and you don't get any of it, then you need new people to share bottles with.
    If you need the people you are sharing with to KNOW it is your beer to get 'credit' for it, you are not someone I want to be in a bottle share with.
  31. Jimjohson

    Jimjohson Initiate (0) Dec 26, 2012 Georgia

    It seems to me we're talking about something we start teaching our kids from the start. "If it's not yours, hands off". It would seem the polite thing to do would be, to hold up the beer and ask who brought this and can we try it? It is not, however, worth mentioning.
  32. Duffman929

    Duffman929 Aspirant (279) Nov 27, 2010 Illinois
    Beer Trader

    We also learned about possessives, contractions, and capitalization......but here we are.
  33. Casedogg43

    Casedogg43 Initiate (0) Jan 4, 2012 Indiana
    Beer Trader

    Really depends on how big the group is. Most of ours are 4-6 people. So not so important who opens. Usually, we set the lineup from the start, so everyone knows what we are drinking and when.

    Larger bottle shares. 10+ people. Open yours.
    Don't dig in others bags, coolers etc. Bad etiquette in general, not just bottle sharing.
  34. Dirty25

    Dirty25 Initiate (0) Jan 22, 2012 Germany

    I could see at a gathering with people you don't know that we'll this might matter.

    Me and my good beer friends hang out at my house weekly and we all take turns picking the beer and opening it. My rules are if its in the fridge it's fair game. My cellar is kinda fair game as well if someone has a special request. Now from time to time if we have something really exceptional ill ask who brought it if they want to open that beer now or wait. Again we are all good friends and we don't need to "one up" or "impress" each other
    SatlyMalty likes this.
  35. Hanzo

    Hanzo Initiate (0) Feb 27, 2012 Virginia

    If I go through the trouble of hunting down an awesome beer to share with people I don't see anything wrong with getting a little credit for it. If you made some delicious dish for a pot luck that everyone loved wouldn't you want people to know you brought it?

    I'm not saying you need a medal or anything, but you should get first crack at what you bring.
  36. Timmush

    Timmush Aspirant (292) Jan 5, 2008 New Jersey
    Beer Trader

    nah. I am not in it to get praise, just to share.
    If I donate to charity, I don't go around telling everybody about it.
    as far as "Getting first crack at it", what is the difference as long as you get some?
  37. pvllbum

    pvllbum Initiate (0) Sep 4, 2007 Illinois

    I don't know about anyone else but the small group of people that I work with that really loves beer we have random tastings...more along the lines of hey is anybody working...nope sweet I got a bottle of this and we meet up at someones house and try it...or maybe after work in the corner...just saying lol. We've had actual planned get togethers and usually we put everything in the beer fridge and take turns going and grabbing a bottle and whoever brought the bottle opens and pours themselves first and passes around.
  38. Hanzo

    Hanzo Initiate (0) Feb 27, 2012 Virginia

    When you donate to charity do you give it to them directly or do you give it to someone else to give to them?

    "First crack at it" means you are guaranteed a pour. If there is enough people there is a chance your bottle could get back to you with next to nothing in it. Look, I'm all about sharing, I actually prefer sharing the beers I acquire than drinking them alone. I am just saying people need to respect personal property and have some decency.

    If you see a bottle on the table you want to open, ask the owner if you can pop it, if the owner isn't around you wait. I mean if there are no rules and everyone there just drops their beer in a community cooler/tub then I guess it's a free for all....I just wouldn't go to a share like that, but to each their own.
  39. Timmush

    Timmush Aspirant (292) Jan 5, 2008 New Jersey
    Beer Trader

    I must know better people than you because I have never been to a bottle share where a bottle was opened and I wasn't offered any
  40. Hanzo

    Hanzo Initiate (0) Feb 27, 2012 Virginia

    Never happened to me, but I have seen it happen. When you have 15+ people and friends of friends attending things can happen. It really matters what size group you have and if you know them all. If it is a small tasting with close friends then of course all of this would be moot.
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