Things beer store employees probably say about us

So this. I went to the store and looked at almost every bottle on the shelf before I walked out with the 12 pack of Sam Summer that my wife sent me there for. Who wanders around the store for 15 minutes before leaving with a case of the most ubiquitous beer in Boston right now? This guy.

 

I work at Hawthorne's in Philadelphia at 11th and Fitzwater.

 

"I'm only carding you because you have your ID out in hand. I looked at your bottles and was thinking 'no one under 21 would be buying a belgian quad and a bourbon aged imperial stout...they'd be buying bud or coors or keystone.' So based on your beer. i wasn't going to card you, even though you look really young."

Believe it or not, this was a true story.

 

"Just this..?"

 

Sad thing is I will have an employee beside me but still get asked where something is. Don't work here but more then glad to help.

 

"I better go show him what's new and fresh, so he's not analyzing every fucking bottle for the next 30 minutes"

 

That short stocky guy, is really passionate about beer or crazy about beer, depending on the knowledge of the clerk.
That dude needs to get a life.
Did he really drink all the beer he bought yesterday last night?
Wow did he just spend $30 on a 12 pack?
One tall beer for $20, fuck me running he has a problem!

 

"Here comes that hipster toolbag, again!"

 

As someone working at a liquor store, definitely this. If a customer comes in and asks if we can hold a bottle of some limited item for them and I don't know who they are (or if I recognise them as someone who only asks for the limited stuff), the answer is 'we operate first come first serve, sorry' Whereas for a good regular (someone we see in the store frequently who tends to buy something each time they're in) we unofficially set aside bottles.

 

I think the employees that work in liquor stores that don't know much about beer think it's nerdy, while the ones that do know about beer probably just find it annoying. I hate asking the manager if they have beer that isn't on the shelf, but sometimes they do and you never know until you ask. The first time I did was a few years ago, and this store randomly had Abacus, Parabola, Life & Limb, Firestone 15, J.W. Lees 1999, and Weyerbacher Fourteen just hangin' in the back.

 

"Jesus, the last thing this fatass needs is beer. At least get the light stuff."

 

"Thanks for putting my kid's through college"
or
"Why does it always take this guy 30 minutes to pick out a beer?"

 

"Quick, hide all the fresh IPAs"

 

So you just ask them if they have beers in the back that aren't on the shelf? I only do that for specific items but I shall give it a try

 

"Stop picking out and putting back the same beer 3 times/make up your mind, ho."

 

I'm not saying that every employee says "sure" and offers you a plethora of Cantillon. I'm just saying it's worth a shot. There's a store by me that I know for a fact has Cantillon, Raison d'extra, Fantome and Blushing Monk, just not on the shelves.

 

No, "I'll see ya tomorrow"

 

I run a shop in SoCal. 80% of the beer is craft, and 99% of craft beer customers are awesome. Especially the new ones that have an open mind and are willing to try new things before they look up the BA rating. The ones that get me are the guys that want whales, and only whales, and will never ever buy anything unless its a whale.

 

What part of SoCal?

 

Eh, you're pretty quick compared to most.