FedEx "What's in the box?!?"

We all celebrate Prince's life differently.

 

Yeah not a usual question by my fedex, unless it's the manager then she will ask me every time, even though she sees me often enough to know I'm a usual customer. The other employees are "drop off?" "Place it on the scale" and "here's your receipt".

 

I have a couple bags of candy (the noisier the better) and I put some in my trades
so when they shake or move the box they hear candy moving and it masks the liquid sounds

so when they ask I say "candy!" with my silly face =P

 

Evidence in a murder trial. Stops conversation immediately.
Also makes sense as my return address is my law firm.

 

"What's in the box?"
"I'm helping my mom sell her snow globe collection on eBay."

Or, if you want to be a snarky bastard, you can just say "I am not sending anything deemed by FedEx to be dangerous goods and that is all you need to know."

 

I use a small independent family owned shipping store here in Mass other than going straight to Fedex. Ive known the guy who works there for years, and I know him on a first name basis. The only he question he asks me is "how is your wife and kids"...

Box shipped.
Friends made.

 

I usually say olive oil.. You wouldn't believe the detail I've had to go into while explaining my wife's fake olive oil pressing business.

 

If I get asked, which doesn't happen all that often, I usually say artisan maple syrup. Blis, who provides the maple syrup barrels for Founders CBS, is in West Michigan and I usually tell them I have chef friends in other states who can't get enough of the stuff

 

"Local olive oil", "Camera Lens and a bottle of lens cleaner"

 

Add some beer and now we got a party!

 

I have a Lava Lamp business matching custom lava and base colors with sports teams. Even have business cards.

The name and slogan of the business is the best part..."Mr Lava Lava...They call me Mr. Lamp-tastic".

Only wrinkle I've ever had is when employee asked me if I could sell her an Ohio State lamp for her son for Christmas. Thought on my feet and said "since the tsunami in Asia I haven't been able to get red lava". I'm totally going to hell for that.

 

Homemade hot sauce is what I say. More believable than shipping a shitload of olive oil all the time.

 

i just tell them im a part of a home brewers coalition and im shipping bottles of wort to other home brewers to turn into beer. if they dont know what wort is, i tell them its sugar water and the questions usually stop there.

 

All-natural Essential Oils....

enter something about wife is involved in this essential oil multi-level marketing business....

<although not in one personally, these people ship a ton of oils>

 

I had 1 local store that always asked. I always told them my wife made salsas and preserves and made me come ship them out. The ladies working there were very chatty and got to know me by name. So no problem until UPS "randomly inspected" 2 of my boxes. Now I'm not welcome back there.
It helps to bounce around between stores. I found one that never asked. He charged more than everywhere else but sometimes I'm willing to pay that tax for the peace of mind.

 

Commenting on this thread for the 2nd time...

So I stopped into FedEx today with my label printed out, threw the box on the scale and tried started making small talk with the guy... He wasn't having any of it.

Him- What are you shipping?
Me- Maple Syrup.
Him- I need to open your box to make sure it's not alcohol. There's been a lot of people doing that lately.
Me- That seems excessive. I just told you it wasn't alcohol.
Him- Do I have permission to open your box?
Me- No. I don't feel comfortable with this interaction. I'll be taking my box and leave.

Here's the thing, he scanned my label while it was on the scale. When I check the tracking it shows "in FedEx possession". Since it's been scanned will I be charged? Not a huge deal either way, just happy to have my box, but I'm wondering.

Looks like it's time to find a new drop location!

-Kevin

 

No you cant be charged until there is a proof of delivery, all you have is an origin ID .

 

This is correct ^^^ print label from internet (your account) and simply drop off at desk, and say have a nice day.

 

In my town the actual FedEx location is staffed by a woman who is a PITA. I either use the Print & Ship office or there's a place that accepts everything (FedEx, UPS, etc). Like others have said I walk in, tell them there's a label, don't need a receipt, have a nice day.

In the past I have said salsa.

 

I made fake "Mike's Original BBQ Sauces" label and tape it to the boxes now. Looks like a legit small business endeavor. Haven't had an issue yet.