worst beer mile beers

Discussion in 'Great Lakes' started by bad_beer_miler, Aug 25, 2020.

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  1. bad_beer_miler

    bad_beer_miler Initiate (0) Aug 25, 2020 Kansas

    I request the help of this learned community. I'm a member of a group that every year requires one unlucky member to run a beer mile - e.g. run four laps around a track, drinking one beer before each lap. The only rules is that it has to be a 12oz beer - everything else is fair game. This year I get to select one of the beers that the unfortunate runner must consume.

    My question to you is what is the worst beer I can pick for this poor but willing soul? Tradition dictates this be a very unpleasant experience for the runner, so I'm hoping for something that will not only taste bad but also feel bad as they complete the mile run in hot weather. Thanks in advance.
     
    #1 bad_beer_miler, Aug 25, 2020
  2. 4DAloveofSTOUT

    4DAloveofSTOUT Grand Pooh-Bah (4,064) Nov 28, 2008 Illinois
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Stout aged in malort barrels.
     
    #2 4DAloveofSTOUT, Aug 25, 2020
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  3. bad_beer_miler

    bad_beer_miler Initiate (0) Aug 25, 2020 Kansas

    That sounds truly awful. Where can I find it?
     
    #3 bad_beer_miler, Aug 25, 2020
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  4. TrailsandAles

    TrailsandAles Aspirant (277) Sep 10, 2014 Minnesota

    Does Surly Abrasive come in 12oz cans
     
    #4 TrailsandAles, Aug 25, 2020
  5. Lorddevn

    Lorddevn Initiate (0) Mar 10, 2019 Wisconsin
    Trader

    BA ten Fidy
     
    #5 Lorddevn, Aug 25, 2020
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  6. FBarber

    FBarber Grand High Pooh-Bah (7,325) Mar 5, 2016 Illinois
    Mod Team BA4LYFE Society Pooh-Bah Trader

    I'd say a nice warm Bud light Clamato Chelada.
     
    #6 FBarber, Aug 25, 2020
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  7. bad_beer_miler

    bad_beer_miler Initiate (0) Aug 25, 2020 Kansas

    It appears to only come in pints, so unfortunately it doesn't qualify. But thanks for the suggestion.
     
    #7 bad_beer_miler, Aug 25, 2020
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  8. Uberdachen

    Uberdachen Devotee (355) Jun 21, 2019 Minnesota
    Trader

    Ghost pepper beer left out in the sun
     
    #8 Uberdachen, Aug 25, 2020
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  9. Singlefinpin

    Singlefinpin Pooh-Bah (2,400) Jul 17, 2018 North Carolina
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Imperial Stouts should get the response you are looking for.
     
    #9 Singlefinpin, Aug 25, 2020
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  10. Chaz

    Chaz Grand Pooh-Bah (3,668) Feb 3, 2002 Minnesota
    BA4LYFE Society Pooh-Bah Trader

    #10 Chaz, Aug 26, 2020
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  11. Dave2234

    Dave2234 Savant (1,094) Aug 20, 2013 Minnesota

    Backchannel MASH? 16.5% ABV, and local.
     
    #11 Dave2234, Aug 26, 2020
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  12. eawolff99

    eawolff99 Pooh-Bah (2,422) May 10, 2010 Minnesota
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Not a 12oz format unfortunately but great call.

    My vote is batch 1 - 12oz cans of tinny, horrific aged Rum King!!! If I didn’t use all of mine to cook worlds most expensive beer brats I’d throw you some cans. If you can track a can down your friend will hate you - guaranteed!!
     
    #12 eawolff99, Aug 26, 2020
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  13. Lansman

    Lansman Savant (1,116) Mar 19, 2011 Missouri
    Trader

    The correct answer is- and always will be- Bully Guppy.
     
    #13 Lansman, Aug 26, 2020
  14. fargofallout

    fargofallout Crusader (430) Nov 30, 2010 Minnesota
    Trader

    My vote is also for the highest ABV stout you can find, or some sort of spicy beer. You don't want to kill your friend, but an 18% Dogfish Head World Wide Stout would catch up to them pretty quickly.
     
    #14 fargofallout, Aug 26, 2020
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  15. HouseofWortship

    HouseofWortship Pooh-Bah (2,735) May 3, 2016 Illinois
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Really? They don't want to kill him yet we are suggesting 12oz of an 18% stout on top of 3 more beers while having him run in hot sun..:rolling_eyes:


    If you want to make them feel sick, just find 4 very lactic tasting sours with high carbonation.
     
    #15 HouseofWortship, Aug 26, 2020
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  16. Bond111

    Bond111 Zealot (708) Feb 14, 2011 Minnesota
    Trader

    Sorry, this sounds like a stupid thing to be a part of.
     
    #16 Bond111, Aug 26, 2020
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  17. jamshard2mash

    jamshard2mash Initiate (0) May 4, 2017 California
    Trader

    Habanero Sculpin. Is this still produced?
     
    #17 jamshard2mash, Aug 26, 2020
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  18. dbhammel

    dbhammel Initiate (0) Oct 24, 2016 Minnesota

    High ABV RIS would be tough but I was thinking high carb high acid sour would be tough to stomach while running.
     
    #18 dbhammel, Aug 26, 2020
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  19. Beer_Economicus

    Beer_Economicus Pooh-Bah (2,698) Apr 8, 2017 Ohio
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    The beers that will be the most uncomfortable to drink while running would be
    • Spiciest beers
    • highest ABV beers (World Wide Stout was a good suggestion @ 18%)
    • Beers closest to vinegar

    Anything that should be a "Sipper" would classify. You get to be the judge of how much you want to punish them by selections beers at the appropriate portion of the punishment spectrum.

    A tomato/pizza beer sounds pretty aweful for this.
     
    #19 Beer_Economicus, Aug 26, 2020
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  20. bad_beer_miler

    bad_beer_miler Initiate (0) Aug 25, 2020 Kansas

    It most assuredly is. But that's most of the fun.
     
    #20 bad_beer_miler, Aug 26, 2020
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