Favorite or Classic BA personalities

The 'Brand Spanking New to Craft Beer' guy with the baby palate who thinks he knows it all but doesn't.
The 'Sneering Elitist Old Beer Guy' with the pensioners palate who thinks he knows it all but doesn't.

Wait a minute...

 

Technically Lagunitas "Sucks" according to their own beer

 

the IPA freshness ****s that think the hops have fallen off after 2 weeks and that the beer is basically not drinkable or worth them buying

 

The No-5's BA: My thinking is that everyone should have rated at least one beer a 5. Personally, there are BAs on here whose reviews I enjoy reading. When I go to their pages and see the beers they've had in the past, I like to see what their ideas of perfection are. But sometimes, I find no perfection. When you have no marker of perfection to base your reviews, how can you give less-than-perfect beers an honest review?

This seems confusing to me. If there are any No-5's out there that would like to explain their misfortune of not having found a beer that just floors them with perfection, I'm all ears (technically, eyes).

 

The Locavore BA - similar to the Homer BA, but more overt and religious/zealous in insisting that one buy local, support local, even if there are superior tap alternatives or bottles for purchase. Locavore BA's also share the inconsistency of mainstream locavores who are only selectively supporters of local products, with most items they buy actually coming from somewhere else.

The Untraveled American Exceptionalist BA - no frequent flier miles here, half brother to the Locavore and the Homer, very proud American spirit, this person makes it a point to chime in on every German style recommendation thread (or Belgian) with American examples of the style, even though the American attempts are nowhere near as good as the authentic European examples. They key component here is that this BA has never been to these countries, had them fresh, and has zero experiential knowledge on the topic to make an informed judgment (yet gives an opinion anyway).

The Untraveled Lame State BA - also related to the locavore, homer, and Untraveled American Exceptionalist - this BA resides in a U.S. state that has significantly lagged other states in terms of developing a quality, mature craft beer market. Whether ignorant or delusional, or both, they overhype their state's beer bars, brewpubs, and breweries and even go so far as to claim they are on par with examples from the best cities and metros elsewhere in the country. Example: the Phoenix beer scene is better than that of San Diego, or that Arizona deserves to be ranked ahead of Utah on the best beer states list. This BA is charitably interpreted as untraveled, because if they have spent substantial times in all of the better beer states in the U.S. they wouldn't say what they say about their home state.

 

The "Has-Never-Traveled-and-Blindly-Loves-All-US-Craft-Beers" BA - that person who has rarely traveled, if at all, and gets upset whenever someone who has extensively traveled and homebrewed years before there was a Beeradvocate, speaks ill of US craft beer.

Edit: @yemenmocha beat me to it with the, "Untraveled American Exceptionalist BA".

 

Easy there, Yemen, no need to turn into the Self-Loathing BA

 

The "I hate DFH and Stone for no reason other than the supposed 'They're too big for craft now' BA"

 

Not too sure that insisting on a hoppy beer's freshness is the same as contributing to the Holocaust, but a classic BA none-the-less.

 

This has to be one of my favorite threads in forever. Some of these are so spot on (and maybe even hit close to home for me!) Hahahaha.

 

Guilty as charged.

But you don't have to be a veteran BA to see the same threads appear again and again. You could have joined a year ago and started seeing repeats already.

And I don't gripe about it to show off how long I've been on BA. I'm just expressing disappointment when I surf on over to enjoy some fresh & interesting discussions and see the same ol' same ol' crop up.

 

the snarky comment BA lol.

 

I can totally be emoticon guy at times...

The ones that chap my hide are the ones that post threads like, "I just don't enjoy this beer style as much as I used to, why?" or "Is this style of beer not for me cuz I haven't found one I like yet..." Put on your big boy or girl pants on and drink more or better beer...like writers block - just drink through it (Great now I'm analogy guy...)

 

In threads about Craft or German lagers there is the Idon'tlikelagersbecausetheyareboringBa guy.

 

Sam Adams Hater BA - clearly in vogue for years, this BA hates BBC. Threads asking which BBC seasonal is one's favorite are given nasty replies such as "none", "they're all bad", etc. In most cases, the reasons for hating would also apply to breweries such as Sierra Nevada, or similar, which they happen to not hate. Also, many BBC beers would actually be given thumbs up if tasted in a blind tasting.

 

The lone wolf BA. Creates a thread and when no one replies he goes it alone by replying to his own original post.

 

Then there's the "I-used-to-hate-lagers-but-now-I-found-Jack's-Abby-and-they-make-the-best-lagers-in-the-world" guy (who, BTW, has not still explored lagers beyond macros and Jack's Abby).

 

The Insecure Alcoholic

Am I drinking too much? Am I drinking too much? No really, am I drinking too much? How much do you drink, do I drink more or less than that? Oh my god, I'm drinking too much! ...Am I drinking too much?

 

Thoughts anybody?