Thirst Monster
Union Craft Brewing Company

Thirst MonsterThirst Monster
Beer Geek Stats | Print Shelf Talker
From:
Union Craft Brewing Company
 
Maryland, United States
Style:
Kölsch
Ranked #58
ABV:
5%
Score:
88
Ranked #18,116
Avg:
3.98 | pDev: 5.28%
Ratings:
14 | reviews: 7
Status:
Active
Rated:
Jul 17, 2023
Added:
Jun 08, 2021
Wants:
  0
Gots:
  0
In a world where hops have overtaken the Earth and humans across the planet have been forced to drink candy-based beer by their Craft Beer overlords…one man… err… Monster has set out to save the universe. From the distant planet of Germania-II, the brave Thirst Monster has been traveling the universe in search of epic thirsts to quench. His weapon of choice? The Kölsch – a crisp, refreshing, and easy-drinking German-style ale. Light on its feet with subtley sweet crackery malts and a light sprinkling of herbal and spicy hops – it’s a beer that can take on even the mightiest of thirsts. Will Thirst Monster and his Kölsch arrive in time to save Earth from its own demise? Or will Craft Beer enslave the human race with hops and marshmallows?
Recent ratings and reviews. | Log in to view more ratings + sorting options.
Photo of Lucular
Reviewed by Lucular from Maryland

4.03/5  rDev +1.3%
look: 4 | smell: 4 | taste: 4 | feel: 4.25 | overall: 4
12 oz can poured into a tulip pint glass. Pours a clear straw yellow color with a nice head and lacing. Aroma and flavor feature clean, crisp biscuity/crackery malt, and a hint of spicy hops. Mouthfeel is well-carbonated and very smooth. Overall a great easy-drinking summer beer, and a fantastic representative of the Kölsch style.
Jul 17, 2023
 
Rated: 3.84 by Rhettroactive from Virginia

Oct 08, 2022
 
Rated: 4.13 by siege06nd from Virginia

Oct 08, 2022
Photo of MrOH
Reviewed by MrOH from Virginia

4.52/5  rDev +13.6%
look: 4 | smell: 4.5 | taste: 4.5 | feel: 5 | overall: 4.5
Brilliantly clear yellow, nice white head, good retention, spotty lace
Honey and bread malt aroma, slight herbal/floral hops
Tastes like it smells, lingering finish showing nice interplay between the malt and hops
Light bodied, well carbonated, extremely drinkable
Definitely a great beer for the summers around here.
Jul 10, 2022
 
Rated: 3.84 by HarlotBronte from District of Columbia

Jun 12, 2022
 
Rated: 3.85 by Boone757 from Virginia

May 22, 2022
 
Rated: 3.9 by HanktheTank94 from Maryland

Jul 26, 2021
 
Rated: 3.93 by Mac_Cheesin from Maryland

Jul 22, 2021
Photo of HattedClassic
Reviewed by HattedClassic from Virginia

4/5  rDev +0.5%
look: 4 | smell: 4 | taste: 4 | feel: 4 | overall: 4
The beer pours a fairly voluminous white and fluffy that takes a while to dissipate while the beer is a good-looking clear pale gold.

The smell is very nice. It has a nice and spicy and earth hop note with a honey malt smell that is well-balanced.

The taste is pretty good. It has a well balanced mix of honey and herbal, spicy and earthy bitter hop notes. The honey note comes out first and the hops follow it.

The feel is good. It falls on the border between a light and medium body. The texture is smooth and the carbonation is tingling.

Overall, this is a pretty good beer to have during the summer months and a good interpretation of the style; not to mention a nice break from all the super sweet stuff.
Jun 26, 2021
Photo of daliandragon
Reviewed by daliandragon from Maryland

4.08/5  rDev +2.5%
look: 4 | smell: 4 | taste: 4.25 | feel: 3.75 | overall: 4
I had a sixer of this a few weeks back and had this one left over sitting in the fridge. It is hard to make a good kolsch and this taste nails it with a bright bread note and mellow hops. The texture is quite nice but the carbonation is maybe a touch more than desired, but still pretty good. Another strong effort from Union.
Jun 26, 2021
Photo of Ernald_Elbertson
Reviewed by Ernald_Elbertson from Delaware

3.67/5  rDev -7.8%
look: 3.25 | smell: 3.75 | taste: 3.75 | feel: 3.75 | overall: 3.5
I must be drinking a different beer than everyone else...pours rather cloudy pale gold with significant amounts of sediment. Not the crystal clear body a Kolsch should have. Sediment is contributing a weird yeast-forward flavor that almost reminds me of a belgian blonde, too much ester going on here. A Kolsch can have some degree of ester note, but it should be vinous and grape-like, not the belgian funk I'm getting out of this one. It's not bad, just not what you expect from a beer like this.

Otherwise, it's a pretty standard Kolsch. Without the imperfections, it could get closer to a 4, but it really isn't even close to something like Reissdorf. Hell, I even prefer Rogue's Honey Kolsch, probably the easiest to find in the U.S.
Jun 24, 2021
Photo of Smakawhat
Reviewed by Smakawhat from Maryland

3.72/5  rDev -6.5%
look: 4.25 | smell: 4 | taste: 3.5 | feel: 4 | overall: 3.5
Poured from the can into a Gaffel stange glass. Canned May 24th 2021.

Quite a nice looking kolsch. Big frothy head, with large bubbly shampoo like retention, beyond three fingers tall. Bright lemon brass color, and just a touch of haze with lots of lively carbonation, some slow and some fast.

Good lively nose. Aroma has a good mix of pils like malt sensations, some chewy depth hinting as well but also an interesting candy like fruit note as well.

Palate seems a little bit at odds with itself. Good simple backbone in mouthfeel, but a bit of odd flavors. An odd mix of sweetness and berry notes, with a touch of somewhat faint metallic twinge on the palate. Aftertaste has a bit of iron/ferrous like flavors strangely, mixing with some slight fruit ester and malt sweetness. Slightly cereal like tasting also.

Bit of an odd duck in the kolsch realm, but drinkable nonetheless.
Jun 23, 2021
 
Rated: 3.98 by Hockey_Fan from Maryland

Jun 20, 2021
Photo of milkshakebeersucks
Reviewed by milkshakebeersucks from Maryland

4.18/5  rDev +5%
look: 4 | smell: 4 | taste: 4.25 | feel: 4.25 | overall: 4.25
Appearance: Clear, straw colored body, small white head and light lacing.
Aroma: Cracker-like maltiness yields to herbal, spicy hops
Taste: Slightly sweet on the tongue. A soft fruity quality balances the bready malts. Spices return in the aftertaste.
Feel: Crisp and clean, light bodied, modestly carbonated.
Overall: Pleasantly simple and down-to-earth with no annoying adjuncts.
Jun 18, 2021