Lighthouse Light Lager
Minhas Micro Brewery

 

355ml can. It seems as if I've always seen this in those ubiquitous fridge-friendly 12-packs at your less than reputable donair shop adjacent liquor stores, but was never willing to part with 15 bucks to attain this particular, er, experience. Lo and behold, serendipity smiles her sexy face down on me, and the 'venerable' Sherbrooke Liquor store mistakenly gets an order of this in a few weeks ago (Jim's ghost is obviously still playing tricks). So, since there isn't a format called "dumped down the drain because they can't philosophically or morally sell or return it", let's just get on with it.

This beer pours a mostly clear, urine simulacrum pale yellow colour, with one surprisingly hefty finger of loosely foamy dirty white head, which adheres to spec, and bleeds away nice and quickly, leaving a low shoreline profile of painted lace around the glass - huh. Just, huh.

It smells of weak grainy corn and rice, a low-rent alcohol sweetness that has no business being anywhere near a so-called 'light' lager, a sadly typical cooked veggie astringency, and some further nail polish, um, notes. The taste is very thin stale white bread, soaked in mineral water, mixed with Satan's tears, rather diluted (to its limited credit) paint thinner, and a dank, weirdly aspirational drying 'character'.

The bubbles are quite pliant and forgettable, the body an actual perceptible medium-light weight, but don't ask, and don't tell where it comes from. It finishes on the sweet side, natch, but barely - not to intimate that there's any worthy offset of any sort.

A (sub) standard, cheap-ass light lager, nothing particularly skunky or off-putting about it, and since I have way too much research experience with such LCD tripe, this doesn't quite pass the smell test for Minhas' worst. It's just mid-range bad, as opposed to gag-worthy, fetal position bad. And now I'm feeling morose in acknowledging that I know the difference.