Best quotes from reviews

Discussion in 'Beer Talk' started by sergeantstogie, Sep 21, 2015.

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  1. kbuzz

    kbuzz Initiate (0) Jan 22, 2011 North Carolina

    YES!!! That's what I'm talking about...that's how it's done.
     
    #21 kbuzz, Sep 21, 2015
    ChiCubs78, lockerlove, Kevinpitts and 3 others like this.
  2. IckyT2012

    IckyT2012 Pooh-Bah (2,050) Oct 13, 2014 Florida
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Re: Voodoo Doughnut Maple Bacon
    "...I had to rinse my tulip glass twice."
     
    #22 IckyT2012, Sep 21, 2015
    jakecattleco, sergeantstogie, DaverCS and 16 others like this.
  3. jws6w7

    jws6w7 Initiate (0) Oct 30, 2014 Florida

    @Christopher_Hoagie's review of Busch Light

    "The finest of historical lagers, found myself a 2007 vintage that my wife surprisingly cellared for me. She made the pour perfectly with just the right amount of light head.

    Notes of the Smoky Mountains, and so cold my nipples could cut glass.

    Would highly recommend on a special occasion."
     
    #23 jws6w7, Sep 21, 2015
    Lahey, jakecattleco, WellRested518 and 11 others like this.
  4. atpca

    atpca Pooh-Bah (1,652) Jun 10, 2013 California
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Bourbonic Plague by Cascade Brewing Company (USA)

    Bourbon, menthol, tartness, over ripe fruit. Tastes like grandma's taint.
     
    #24 atpca, Sep 21, 2015
    Lahey, jakecattleco, Dunkelganger4 and 18 others like this.
  5. TheBrewo

    TheBrewo Initiate (0) Nov 11, 2010 New York

    I forget who, or what the beer was, but this user only had like 1 or 2 total reviews.

    "This tastes like Jesus cream."
     
    #25 TheBrewo, Sep 21, 2015
    Lahey, PaulElk, WellRested518 and 1 other person like this.
  6. SoleBriety

    SoleBriety Maven (1,445) Oct 10, 2013 California
    Trader

    I got the stink eye from one of my clients because I'm reading this thread and couldn't contain my laughter. She really thought I was laughing at her.
     
    #26 SoleBriety, Sep 21, 2015
    Lahey, Adrena1ine, beerjerk666 and 10 others like this.
  7. Avelasquez80

    Avelasquez80 Initiate (0) Jul 9, 2015 Texas

    HAHA!! Seriously just happened to me with the last 4 people walking by my office!
     
    #27 Avelasquez80, Sep 21, 2015
    HorseheadsHophead, Kevinpitts, donspublic and 4 others like this.
  8. ThisWangsChung

    ThisWangsChung Pooh-Bah (2,988) Oct 15, 2011 Maryland
    Pooh-Bah

    "It's like they combined ******'s bodily fluids (and I do mean ALL of them) with smegma."

    @kojevergas on Budweiser & Clamato Chelada. His review sounds like the lyrics of a goregrind album, in the best way possible.
     
    #28 ThisWangsChung, Sep 21, 2015
    Lahey, jakecattleco, MrMcGibblets and 13 others like this.
  9. rgordon

    rgordon Pooh-Bah (2,701) Apr 26, 2012 North Carolina
    Pooh-Bah

    With apologies to Ned Beatty and his immortalized character! How come I cannot find @northyorksammys reviews? Those are absolute comic wonders.
     
    #29 rgordon, Sep 21, 2015
    Coronaeus and Geuzedad like this.
  10. StrappingYoungLad

    StrappingYoungLad Initiate (0) Dec 10, 2013 Indiana

    @Villiam 's review of Leinenkugel's Snowdrift Vanilla Porter is brilliant and surreal:

    Little to no head on this brew. Smells of vanilla and coffee. The first taste had a solid vanilla flavor and a slight bitterness. I tries to cleanse the palate with Cheetoes but wiped my hands on the drapes and caught them on fire. Would not burn down my house again for. 2.75/5
     
    #30 StrappingYoungLad, Sep 21, 2015
    dbl_delta, HorseheadsHophead, Lahey and 12 others like this.
  11. Raime

    Raime Pooh-Bah (1,935) Jun 4, 2012 North Korea
    Pooh-Bah

    "Oh Steel, you were so cheap
    Your 8.1 ABV I decided to reap
    BeerAdvocate asked me about your mouthfeel
    And honestly, you make my tastebuds peel

    Lets be honest, I am poor
    So I decided to buy one more
    I poured you into my frosted mug
    The next morning I felt beaten by a thug

    Oh Steel, you taste like liquid metal
    Oh Steel, I feel like I'm licking a kettle
    Please, Steel, you don't look that bad
    But, honestly, you smell like a sweaty dad.

    "
     
    #31 Raime, Sep 21, 2015
    Lahey, FBarber, Adrena1ine and 29 others like this.
  12. jrnyc

    jrnyc Grand Pooh-Bah (3,012) Mar 21, 2010 New York
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    @RaulMondesi writes the best reviews, this sounds like one of his.

    http://www.beeradvocate.com/user/beers/?ba=RaulMondesi
     
    #32 jrnyc, Sep 21, 2015
    Brackh, alwaysplayin, LakerLeith and 2 others like this.
  13. JMS1512

    JMS1512 Initiate (0) Feb 18, 2013 New Jersey

    Creative, and a great reference.
     
    #33 JMS1512, Sep 21, 2015
    gmoneyproductions, Scrapss and sergeantstogie like this.
  14. lester619

    lester619 Initiate (0) Apr 17, 2009 Wisconsin

    What ever happened to Overlord? He had some beauties. I haven't seen anything from him in quite awhile.
     
    #34 lester619, Sep 21, 2015
    bmugan, Ruger, 2beerdogs and 6 others like this.
  15. JMS1512

    JMS1512 Initiate (0) Feb 18, 2013 New Jersey

    I know I had some Thompson-esque lines in some of my reviews, but I'll be damned if I can find them.
     
    #35 JMS1512, Sep 21, 2015
    Raime likes this.
  16. Raime

    Raime Pooh-Bah (1,935) Jun 4, 2012 North Korea
    Pooh-Bah

    I have some pretty great ones too, usually pertaining to the Schlitz series but I feel it would be odd to quote my own
     
    #36 Raime, Sep 21, 2015
    LakerLeith and JMS1512 like this.
  17. JMS1512

    JMS1512 Initiate (0) Feb 18, 2013 New Jersey

    Exactly. Someone else find my good lines, and post them.
     
    #37 JMS1512, Sep 21, 2015
    Hophazzard and LakerLeith like this.
  18. WestcoastMichigander

    WestcoastMichigander Initiate (0) Apr 9, 2015 California

    This thread has brought great joy to me on a dreary Monday, thank you friends
     
    #38 WestcoastMichigander, Sep 21, 2015
    deadonhisfeet, Fargrow, ThisWangsChung and 4 others like this.
  19. DelMontiac

    DelMontiac Initiate (0) Oct 22, 2010 Oklahoma

    Can't remember what beer it was, but I think it went something like this..."I took one sip and my face looked like Don Knotts scared shitless."
     
    #39 DelMontiac, Sep 21, 2015
    MikeySea, 2beerdogs, tylerstravis and 3 others like this.
  20. DelMontiac

    DelMontiac Initiate (0) Oct 22, 2010 Oklahoma

    No doubt. All I could think about today was having to work the next 11 days straight, but this lightened my mood. Well, this thread and a couple of SA Octos.
     
    #40 DelMontiac, Sep 21, 2015
    Scrapss, Raime and sergeantstogie like this.
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