6 Rules for Attending Your First Bottle Share

I host quite a bit, and never expect a gift.

The two gifts of hosting a share:
Not having to drive
Leftovers

 

One thing I haven't seen mentioned here yet is around expectation setting from both the host (to make sure everyone knows what sort of night it is) and the guests checking in to see they understand what types of beers others are bringing.

It is awkward either way to turn up with the wrong thing - rolling in with a bottle of vintage parabola when most people have their favorite DIPA or a $12 shelf bomber makes everyone else feel outdone. Equally, if you turn up with a growler of a cool new local brewery's IPA and everyone else has whales you feel like a cheepskate.

In both circumstances it is on the guests and the host to be clear about what sort of bottle share it is and avoid misunderstandings. That way if someone rolls I'm with a shelf turd to your whale night you know they are actually a mooching douchebag - rather than simply misunderstanding expected beers

 

I quit reading after OP suggested that one bring two 12 ounce beers for 24 people.

 

I would also recommend not trying to impress everyone with your best most hard to get beer. I have been to bottle exchange get together where some newbies were invited and they will bring some Sam Adams or other not so awesome beer. Please some of these folks might not have the palate you have or the ability to enjoy as a seasoned vet. Save the good stuff for those that can really appreciate

 

I'll add "... but not much more than you intend to drink either."

If you come with 6 bombers of bourbon barrel aged imperial stout, then you're encouraging others to do the same (because they don't want to feel like they aren't bringing enough). If you have that much beer per person, then lots of untouched beer will end up going down the drain at the end of it all.

 

Anything over 4-5 people is a party and not a beer tasting.

One thing I've learned about tastings is pour ratios to preference of beer and also tolerance levels.

I weigh 150lbs. 2 others in my beer geek circle are around 250lbs and another guy is pushing 350lbs. I usually pour myself 1/3 of the others to keep pace and I still end up in worse shape (or better depending on perspective).

Also I have 1 guy who doesn't like lagers much, and another guy who doesn't like hoppy beers and another guy who doesn't like wheat & Belgium yeasty beers much. So I give them just a small 1-2oz sampler first of their least favorite style so nothing gets wasted and the others in the group can enjoy the style get more to enjoy. I also make sure the preferred styles are available for the night depending on audience as well.

 

I've learned at our bottle shares, to just pass the bottle and let everyone pour for themselves. This usually, in larger groups, means about 2 oz per person. We had a eleven people at the last one, and every time a 22 made it to the last person, they poured as much as most everyone else.

So, if that's how it happens where you are, when passed a bottle, just remember that everyone else wants to try some, too. If a bottle has any leftovers, get more then.

"Gifts" are whatever gets left in the fridge and nobody wants to take back home with them.

 

or not get Drunk... which shows that rules are not necessarily the rules all the time...

But most importantly to have a lot of great stories to tell the next day...

 

We do something pretty similar - but a bit more directed by the person who doesn't like something. If someone at the share doesn't like a particular style they will usually say 'oh just give me a little, not sure I will like it' but we then leave the rest of their pour in the bottle in case they do really like it. If they don't we share the rest among the others. If they do, then there is a bit left for them to have a proper pour. It is usually up to them to say they didn't like it that much and tell us to go for it.

 

The volume thing really depends on amount of people and how much alcohol is in a specific beer, and if people actually respect each other to allow each to get at least a 2-3 ounce taste.

I guess my group is fortunate. Usually at most there are 4-5 people, we make sure people get each beer and everyone contributes in some way. Even at one guy's bachelor party with 20+ people, we made sure the people that cared about certain beers at least got a taste.

Probably just a difference in being friends vs a group of people meeting for the first time.

 

And, to add to this, I bet there are a ton of German and Belgian beers available to everyone (depending on their distribution) that people haven't had ... or had recently ... or had in a way that fostered comparison. One example: right now all the Belgian Christmas beers are hitting. I haven't had those in years and definitely haven't sampled them side by side. Or how about a style that rarely shows up at a share, like dunkelweizen, that you could get 3 or 4 or for a pretty modest price of entry?

If the folks that you're sharing with look down on that as unworthy of their whales, you're sharing with the wrong folks!

 

Rule #7: Don't kill anyone

 

Can't believe the most important one left out. Have lots and lots of water available to drink and to rinse, and a place to dump the rinse if there is no sink for folks who won't drink the rinse water. Encourage folks to drink as much water as possible. Folks will last longer, and be less hungover next day.

 

Thank you. I read this and was like, "wow, sounds like a bunch of douche bags."

Sharing beer shouldn't have rules. People are so ridiculous.

 

Without rules, we'd just have beer anarchy, which sounds fun on paper, but irl, it's a disaster.

I threw a beer party and a friend showed up with a handful of really sweet beers he had traded for and was super excited to share them with his friends. As it goes, I had invited some other non-beer nerds to get them into the scene. My friend who brought the amazing beers later walked up to me, nudged me with his elbow and pointed. One of the non-beer nerds was drinking one of the rare traded-for beers right out of the bottle.

My point is that without at least a little bit of etiquette and decorum, a beer tasting can turn into a free-for-all disaster.

 

If you share a beer with me 50/50, should I or should I not punch you in the face and take your half?
Should I try to drink all of your beer before you realize it?
Should I hide the beer you bring and pretend I don't know what happened to it so I can drink it later?
Should I drink out of the bottle?
Do I even need to bring anything at all and then just drink everyone else's good beer?
If I do so, should I be invited back to the next tasting?
Should I get shit-faced as fast as humanly possible and just start pounding back whatever I can find?
Should my White Whale be treated the same as the Sam Addams Lager someone else brought?

If you have feelings one way or another about any of these, you've already contradicted yourself.

And just for flavor, "Sharing beer shouldn't have rules" is a rule.

Also just as an aside, wherever this rule-less beer sharing anarchy takes place, the only mental image that comes to mind is the biker-bar from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, where rules are always ad hoc, like if you don't like someone's beer, you have to do a ridiculous dance on the bar.

 

You just proved my point. The answers to your questions are so obvious that to have to write down and explain to others how one should or should not behave is ludicrous. It speak to the level of maturity of beer geeks when someone has to make it a rule that you shouldn't "constantly slam your samples and ask what’s next." If you need to be told or reminded not to behave that way you're a clown. I see no contradiction of my original statement in the slightest.

 

We call them shares, But I think for the most part, many patrons are inherently selfish. "What ten whales can I try by giving up 'this' (an extra mind you) to a bottle share". "Is my perceived value of a local breweries 2011 BBA IS too high vs. what others are bringing?" "Is price or trade value involved here in my perceived value?" I'm probably pretty methodical myself in some regards.

Maybe I haven't lost faith in beer drinkers afterall. Most bottle shares seem to go over rather well.. By hour two, everyone is probably too buzzed to really be caring. One could switch out the great stuff for shelf turds and everyone would still be having a good time.. So I'm not sure good beer is the entire winning point here

 

In theory, I agree with you but I have witnessed and heard of some very bad behavior at tastings. I think having some loose guidelines to acclimate people to some etiquette is a good thing. I once had my balls busted by a girl who I had just met that night because she didn't like an out of market BA stout that no one in the group had, including me, had ever had before. I just pretended to apologize, but was obviously more than a bit annoyed. I have also seen other people open bottles of very rare stuff that didn't belong to them. Bad form...

 

I kinda agree, kinda don't, and I think your idea works for small tastings and might not for large.

Who pours? Who picks bottles? Should the goal be for everyone to try everything, or is it okay to have a couple different beers going in splinter groups? Is everyone responsible for cleaning as you go? I can see how it seems like free form is so much more appealing in that it would seem to offer more fun without any rules, in reality without at least a few rules folks can get butthurt from things not made clear, I have seen it happen.