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Discussion in 'Bad Traders' started by Dark_Scarecrow, Jan 6, 2019.
What does this mean? Is it known where this guy works? Does he work in the industry?
I mostly agree with this. But, I will say that there are sometimes psychological hurdles to overcome. My sister is particularly bad about avoiding you once she has missed a call, an event, upset you, or let you down. It spirals violently out of control until everyone is miserable and unhappy, and her avoidance only goes to make her more unhappy en route to the pinnacle.
I have no doubt that he is CAPABLE of responding because he is on here. If something has happened, though, I definitely understand that he might be avoiding people and still using other aspects of BA as a self-soothing device.
This is more cuddly than most on here want to be, but I am just saying that I can understand how someone can be online while still being avoidant. I don't condone it, but I get it.
Dean, just messaged you. i am aware i owe you a box (or 2) and i do have some beers set aside for you and just haven’t shipped them yet. i apologize for the lack of communication. i have no excuse for that. as for shipping, it’s been a combination of the holidays, work and being sick. again, sorry for the delay on shipping and for not getting back to you. i have not forgotten about you. i have your beers & will ship them out on Monday 1/14.
The power of a bad trader thread strikes again! Would be appropriate if a trade request was opened and feedback was left to reflect this thread. OP may end up getting their beer and bad trader finally appeared, but this whole thing is not cool at all.
Hello @Luscious_Malfoy . I did receive your message this morning. Thank you for getting in touch. I am sorry that it got to this point. I just wish you would have reached out sooner. It was very frustrating to see that you had logged in but did not reply to my messages. I realize that things can happen. I am very understanding and would have worked out something with you - just needed to hear from you to do so.
You helped me get started in the trading process. I really enjoyed trading with you. You opened doors to breweries that I may have never got to try. I am certain that you have traded some amazing beers on BA, much to the delight of the trade recipients and I hope that can continue. I commend you for addressing the issue and thank you for agreeing to correct it.
Every trader on BA is an 'independent business'. Customer service is the top priority. Everyone here knows the products, it is how you handle the process and communicate that makes all the difference. Thank you and I will be in touch on the DM.
It seems as though a resolution is now in sight. I would like to give a big thank you to everyone for their feedback and support with this issue. I appreciate it. Cheers to all !!
don’t apologize man. it’s not your fault. it’s mine. and i never had any intention of not hitting you back with a box, but i should have communicated to you a timeline so we were both on the same page and you weren’t stressing on whether or not i was going to fulfill my end of the trade.
our trades were always kind of open ended after the first initial trade, so i probably justified that in my mind with not hustling to get a box out to you. which you probably wouldn’t have even cared about had i kept in contact. so again, i apologize for that and will get your box out first thing monday morning.
One of the things that always strikes me in these BT threads, is what different lives we all have. Both the OP and Luciouis_Malfoy seem like pretty good guys, they had a great trading history together, and seem to even have a pretty friendly relationship. Yet for some reason, and completely out of the blue, this little incident cropped up. The initial response posted by @Lucious_Malfoy... if he had just sent the OP something similar when the OP first reached out to him, there never would have been a BT thread. Yet for whatever reason, life got in the way for a while, and he didn't respond to the OP's communication attempts.
I'm not sure I'll ever understand just what happened here, but it's good to hear that the situation seems to have been resolved and that there are no (apparently) hurt feelings.
the situation was: i was blatantly ignoring my BA life for real life and didn’t take the time to communicate to my trade partner. classic mistake. 100% on me. in addition to apologizing to Dean, i also apologize to all fellow BA’ers and beer traders. i love this site & the beer community and do not relish one bit being part of what’s wrong or bad about beer and beer trading, but it was my own fault. so again, sorry to all that combed through this. thanks for giving your input and advice to Dean and i will make everything right with him.
The response from @Luscious_Malfoy is a refreshing change of pace for these bad trader threads. Hoping this all gets worked out and we can move on.
Just what I was thinking! No blaming, no deflecting, just “I messed up because real life happens.” Nothing in this thread would make me not trade with either of these guys again
Except for the fact that he ignored the OP's messages over and over until this thread came up while still actively trading on BA.
Yeah I didn’t want to spoil the #goodvibes - and the above posts are right - this thread really is unusual in the sense that there’s a straight up apology with zero defensiveness which is great. But still - seems to me that the ghosting-while-active aspect is being sort of overlooked. But whatever I guess - OP is happy and getting their beer, and everyone else can make their own judgement call as to who they want to trade with in future.
Relative to some other bad trader threads where the person disappears from the site or comes out guns a blazin, bad trader here finally appearing in this thread and taking the blame is good. But compared to the thousands of other trades that happen here with no problems it looks really bad.
I still can’t rationalize ignoring texts and messages but still being very active on here. Oh well, bad trader thread achieved desired result here and OP will hopefully get his beer. I still think they both should open a trade request and OP should leave bad feedback and reference this thread. Part of the point of feedback is to protect the community.
Agreed. Even with developed trade relationships, what’s the harm in following through with trade requests. It keeps everything legit, takes no time at all, plus you pad your trade stats each time.
Happy for the OP that he will get his beer but also don't find the BT's response "refreshing" at all. He says he was blatantly ignoring his BA life yet he was posting here pretty much every day, posting and answering trade requests, rating beers he received from OP and others and even commenting in other Bad Trader threads. How is that ignoring your BA life?
"Life got in the way" seems to be the new catch all excuse but if you are actively trading then that is part of your life. It's good all of this got brought to light as at least people can decide after reading this whether they would want to trade with this guy given the facts.
While I agree that there probably wasn't a good enough excuse in this world to justify his actions, I feel better about him stating it the way he did than lying about a family member's death.
It took him far too long to respond but we all know how daunting some things can get when put off to the side forever. I for one, think that this box should include some spectacular beers. I am not saying you can buy someone over, but I think extras are more than justified for the amount of stress/time OP has lost over what should have been a simple trade.
And because this can tip the scale for me on what is a very controversial matter, I would like to reserve my negative opinion until the trade has been completed.
I would feel better about it too except seems he just swapped one lie for another:
The BT in question has posted 95 times, other than this string, since the beginning of November until today. 95 posts but no response to the OP.
Thankfully he wasn't too sick or busy with the holidays to attend the Side Project anniversary party. Whew.
It takes two fucking seconds to respond to someone on BA, much less your established trading partner. This was "blatantly ignoring" the OP, not your BA life. As @charlesanaheim said, your next box(es) should have some unbelievably spectacular beers. In fact, I'd love to have @Dark_Scarecrow report back as to what he receives.
Amazing how consistently a BT thread gets people's attention whose life gets in the way.
Don't get me wrong - I'm in no way excusing the prior behavior, but it seems like every one of these threads anymore ends with the bad trader coming out guns blazing blaming everyone else and then when backed into a corner reminding us all that its "just fucking beer". BT in this case at least came in here and owned up to his bad behavior.
People make mistakes...it was a dick move, he appologized, and he said he’ll make up for it. As long as he sends the box I don’t see why we need to crucify the guy. Pretty sure we’ve all done stupid stuff and been forgiven for it.
It's refreshing because @Luscious_Malfoy didnmt fight or disagree with his wrong doing, he owned it.
Still bad behavior, but he is showing remorse, and wants to make up for it.
Not sure if anyone else here has ever been in any type of relationship (work, friends, married), but second chances are Often deserved, and without them I can't imagine a relationship I'd want to be in.
@Luscious_Malfoy deserves the flack he has thrown his way, and this thread will be here for anyone to read. Forever. That's a lot like having an arrest. If you have another slip up, it's documented that you already slipped up, and punishment will be more servere next time. Same thing here - both by the community and admins.
Not sure what people want beyond this. A ban? That seems like overkill. What more would you ask? Negative feedback? I'd be fine with that, but I can see where lines start to get blurred and precedent begins being set. -And the associated problems. After all, this isn't always about convening a tribunal, it's more akin to a town hall and public shaming to decide if you should be kicked out of town or allowed to stay and remain (somewhat) shunned.
I think there should be a trade request set up and negative feedback left. The “life got in the way of BA life” stuff falls somewhere between BS and being overplayed. It took a bad trader thread to fix a multi-month issue despite the OP attempting contact on and off BA multiple times. A less experienced trader would have been ripped apart. But cos the guy has 100+ trades there are comments along the lines of “would trade with either of them in the future”. A less experienced person wouldn’t necessarily know to look for BT threads. A 99% rating would at least catch someone’s attention (hopefully)
I totally agree the guy doesn’t need to be crucified. But doesn’t need overly credited for the full apology either.
Fed Ex 7849 5098 2028 & 7849 5098 2039
Thank you for shipping the packages @Luscious_Malfoy . I will update when they arrive.
thanks. sorry again for the hassle.
As listed by @Luscious_Malfoy , two boxes of assorted bottles and cans arrived today. Everything was packaged well and was in excellent condition.