Craft Beer Misnomers

"craft beer"

 

Only if they are interested. Otherwise, I'd just be insanely grateful that someone who drinks non-craft beer thinks enough of you to buy something like Racer 5, knowing you don't drink Natty Light.

 

"heavy" or "thick" beers
"micro-brews"
"fancy beers"
"dark beers"
"hoppy beers"

I just smile and nod.

 

My mom calls them Heavy, fancy, dark, or thick beers

 

Slightly off topic, but in the vein of non-craft beer people

I work part time at Total Wine, I hear that kind of stuff all the time...things like "I don't want anything hoppy...like Guiness" or "I'm picking up some beer for my husband/boyfriend, he likes IPAs and Shock Top, what should I get him?"

 

I've heard all of these.

Strong, heavy, thick, dark, hoppy. Edit: Also "expensive".

Also the AAL crowd (and waitresses that don't work at places that deal in much craft beer) tend to refer to beers like Shock Top and Blue Moon as craft.

"So what craft beers do you have?"
"Ummmmm...we have Shock Top, Blue Moon, Stella..."

 

I would have said something like, ' um, I don't have any dark beers. I think I have another Racer 5 though, is that it?'

 

I used to work at a beer and wine store and too many people called beers outside of adjunct lagers "dark beers." I eventually gave up trying to explain the difference because either people didn't care or didn't believe me. One instance was I said that Negra Modelo was darker than regular Modelo and I was interrupted mid sentence by the person saying "I don't drink dark beers." There was plenty of instances of that sort of thing with craft beer too but that one sticks out. In fact I had a few people refer to the entire craft section as" the dark beer section."

 

When people call any beer they don't enjoy "infected".

 

My pops says I drink sissy beers when I take him on barhops and his beer costs$4-5 and mine costs $7+ and comes in a smaller glass.

 

My sisters call beers that i like "Rudy Beers". Rudy is my family's nickname for me.

 

I'd say a scenario I run across frequently is this, and it's almost exactly the same every time:

Polite person offering me a drink at a get together or bar: Want a beer?
Me: Hmmm, I could maybe go for one... ( )
Polite Person: What do you want?
Me: I'm not sure, let me take a look and see what they have...I'm a bit of a beer connoisseur. You know, 'craft' beers and stuff...
Polite Person: Oh, like Blue Moon?
Me: Yeah...kinda. (On the inside ...no.)

It's always very polite of people to offer, and I'm never an 'ahole' about it, but trying to explain to people what I like and why I like it and why I don't like the beer they like is a bit of a chore some times. haha. Of course the nice thing to do would be to just take the free beer no matter what it is, but for me if I'm going to drink and consume those empty calories...I want to enjoy it so I try to politely as possible come up with a way to decline.

 

I've been in that situation before.. Last time it happened I was drinking 120min and after I explained to them that my beer was stronger than all 3 of theirs combined, they tried it, they changed their tune...and even ended up ordering them. haha

 

All My AAL buddies constantly say " You like those really dark IPA's and shit"…. to wit I respond, over and over, I don't really like IPA's but I drink decent beer… It gets old after the 5000th time

 

I guess if I were in that position I would skip the unsolicited proclamation of connoisseurship and just peek to see what's available. Or if they DO get around to asking 'like Blue Moon?', I'd just give'm a 'nope. not like Blue Moon.'

 

Reading this thread is making me unreasonably angry.

 

Agreed. No need to call yourself a connoisseur or such. If I'm offered a beer, I usually say "Well, I'm a pain in the ass with food and beer, let me buy the first round." Then I buy what I want and get the other person whatever they want. When they're ready to buy a round I can just ask for the same beer I'm already drinking.

 

My Miller Lite drinking brother (12yrs older) calls it "weird beer".