Full Cellar LIF - Creativity Required

Discussion in 'Beer It Forward' started by Sarlacc83, Jul 23, 2012.

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  1. 3rdto1st

    3rdto1st Initiate (0) Dec 1, 2011 California

    The Drinking at Work BIF

    Anyone who signs up must give their work address and boss/supervisor's name. 200oz min, at least 3 KH style whales, no noisemakers, all bottles packed sideways to maximize noise. Shipper keeps track of box and only notifies target on day of delivery. Thus target's box will be delivered to their boss, who will probably open the 40lb+ monster box. Target must then try to explain why the beer was delivered there, and why they should get to keep it. Bonus points go to anyone who can get their boss to let them crack one open while on the job. Major points go to anyone working a corporate job with strict no alcohol policy.
     
  2. RochesterAaron

    RochesterAaron Initiate (0) May 24, 2007 New York

    How many bonus points for being a high school teacher? Pretty sure this one would cost me my job although the assistant principal and I regularly trade homebrew and talk beer.
     
  3. FalconA

    FalconA Initiate (0) Aug 10, 2011 Massachusetts

    Positive or negative points for being in a corporate job with a strict "growler Friday" policy?
     
  4. 3rdto1st

    3rdto1st Initiate (0) Dec 1, 2011 California

    hahah, you just inspired me to up the ante. When the BIF starts, all participants send a whale to the organizer. At the end, everyone writes up what happens including if they kept their job or got fired. Participants vote, and the box of whales is sent from the organizer to an even higher up this time. (like superintendent in your case, CEO/VP whatever in a company) If you can talk that person in to giving you the box of whales, you win at life forever.
     
  5. 3rdto1st

    3rdto1st Initiate (0) Dec 1, 2011 California

    Probably negative, trying to give more points for the more work you have to do to get the beer/keep your job. A lax beer policy kinda defeats that.
     
  6. RochesterAaron

    RochesterAaron Initiate (0) May 24, 2007 New York

    Ultimate Wale (sic) BIF
    White Whale's only. I will organize the BIF and assign the targets. Everyone must ship a pre-approved white whale to their target within the shipping window. Note that the shipping window will be very short (approx. one week). Oh, by the way I am everyone's target and will disappear from BA shortly after the designated shipping date. You may see your beers on ebay in the future. (Alternate Name: RochesterAaron's ebay retirement plan)
     
  7. Sarlacc83

    Sarlacc83 Initiate (0) Mar 2, 2008 Oregon

    If you've been thinking about your submission, better get it in tonight. Tomorrow's judgment day.
     
  8. Jparkanzky

    Jparkanzky Initiate (0) Apr 5, 2011 Ohio


    My submission lost steam in terms of "Likes" probably because people are afraid to be shunned from future participation :slight_frown:
     
  9. Beerontwowheels

    Beerontwowheels Initiate (0) Nov 22, 2009 Maryland

    Everyone in my office now knows that I'm not working right now. I cannot stop laughing.
     
  10. Sarlacc83

    Sarlacc83 Initiate (0) Mar 2, 2008 Oregon

    Is this a bad time to mention that I'm not actually going to do this LIF anymore? Kind of a pity. Some really bad ideas in here.
     
  11. leedorham

    leedorham Initiate (0) Apr 27, 2006 Washington

    Slow clap...
     
  12. Sarlacc83

    Sarlacc83 Initiate (0) Mar 2, 2008 Oregon

    Alright, since obviously no one was going to buy the feint, which was a good thing, since I was semi-worried someone would report it and get this whole thread deleted, on to the coronations for worst ideas. As you might expect, this was a difficult decision. I wish I had enough beer to give to the runner ups because it sucks when you toss out a good idea and it doesn't get picked. But since my wife would kill me for sending out that many free boxes, we make do.

    First: The Easter Egg award goes to Rempo for the Bad Trader BIF. I was going to use it as an example in the first write up, which meant that there was no way I could judge it fairly. Because of my 'bias' against it, I decided the first person to mention it would get a single shipper with either 2010 Vlad or Cerasus. So congratulations to Rempo for mind melding himself out of 2 beers.

    Some other awards before we get to the grand prize.

    The Disqualified But Still Funny Award: Jparzansky. Insulting that mess of a BIF probably doesn't mesh with the idea of a LIF, but I still laughed.

    The Good Ideas Trying to Go Wrong Award: FalconA and RWNewhouse.

    Honorable Mentions. (I enjoyed all the posts, but these were in the running for the win. Which makes it worse they didn't win for the players, right?)

    leedorham - "Grand Cru" The idea was worse and worse every time I read it.
    jivex5k - "Beat the Heat" Truly terrible.
    FalconA - "Know Thy Neighbor" This made me laugh harder than any post except the winner.

    Runner Up:

    CooperEllis - "Diminishing Returns" Really well thought confusion. Took me several read-throughs to get the total gist, making it perfect to trap people.

    Winner:

    HegemonyCricket. "Russian Roulette" When my wife shakes her head and tells me, "Oh my God." it's too good to pass up.

    Rempo and HegemonyCricket will be contacted through Private Conversation. Thanks all!
     
  13. trancesk8er

    trancesk8er Initiate (0) Jan 19, 2011 California

    I know I missed the dealing by a few mins but wanted to post this for fun.

    x has time at my grandmas house one of the uncles always brings a case of the cheapest beer at the time. This has been going on since I was a kid. There are almost full cases of things like busch, bud, and other misc shit like that with born on dates going back into the early 1990's. Package a nice vertical of each and send those out! haha
     
  14. FalconA

    FalconA Initiate (0) Aug 10, 2011 Massachusetts

    Great LIF and congrats to the winners!

    At least the consolation Like's are flowing in. After free beer, the next best thing is good likes:messages horatios.

    Plus, I consider Bourbon Fred muling a pretty sweet award :wink:
     
  15. leedorham

    leedorham Initiate (0) Apr 27, 2006 Washington

    Dammit.

    I wanted that Cerasus too. I passed one up when I was in Portland because it was $20.
     
  16. hegemonycricket

    hegemonycricket Initiate (0) Jul 17, 2012 Chad

    Thanks to Luke for coming up with the best lif that I can remember.

    Thanks to you sick degenerates for liking my story. Gives me hope for the future of this site.
     
  17. CooperEllis

    CooperEllis Initiate (0) Feb 25, 2010 New York

    Well, thanks. That's what I'm good at.

    Damn, I knew I should have had the last target shoot the OP.
     
  18. Rempo

    Rempo Initiate (0) Jan 18, 2010 Indiana

    Woohoo! Now I have to think of my own LIF to put up.

    Loved the Russian Roulette BIF. The wife says it may be more saddening to shoot at the box of whales.
    Still don't completely understand the Diminishing Returns BIF. It actually hurt my head to try to figure it out...
     
  19. FalconA

    FalconA Initiate (0) Aug 10, 2011 Massachusetts

    The Russian Roulette LIF:

    Exactly one of the flaps on the LIF'ed box is wired to an explosive. Open with care.
     
  20. hegemonycricket

    hegemonycricket Initiate (0) Jul 17, 2012 Chad

    Eh, I've always found tragic decisions with questionable rewards trumps explosions for audiences of hooligans.
     
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