how to handle a situation

Discussion in 'Trade Talk' started by shirtless_mike, Apr 17, 2015.

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  1. shirtless_mike

    shirtless_mike Maven (1,440) Aug 4, 2010 Indiana
    Trader

    So this fella and I agreed to a trade back on March 20th. He would send me this and I would send him that. He wanted to wait to ship a full week later for reasons I didn't ask. During that time, he came back to me and said one of the 4 packs he thought he had only contained 1 of the beer I was asking for so he was 3 short. I said, "hey, it's fine. Replace them with these scotch ales you said you have".

    Well, I get a message a day or 2 later saying those scotch ales were "a casualty of the Wisconsin Badgers game". So now I'm out of luck on that. He wants to make it right and goes on the hunt for the original 4 pack I asked for and has a friend who helps him out with the missing bottles. Alright, fine.

    So the week rolls by and it's now Friday (March 27th) but I let him know we should ship Monday because it was going to be freezing all weekend. No sense in risking it. He obliges.

    That Sunday I'm headed to FedEx to drop his box off (knowing it would sit inside the building overnight and ship Monday) and I get a message that he had a family emergency come up. Hey, family takes priority over beer so I'm completely understanding. But then I get a message the following Tuesday or Wednesday saying, "Hey, I'm going to be in Indianapolis (where I live) for the Final Four this weekend. We can make this an IP trade". Sure, let's do it. So I'm left thinking we're gonna meet on Saturday. I message him on Saturday saying, "so it looks like we're not meeting. Want to ship Monday?". He gets back to me saying he thought he messaged me but he can't meet or ship because the family emergency was now a funeral. Again, I understand. Take care of that. So last week I ask if he's got everything situated and he said he would ship this last Monday. Monday comes and he didn't like his packing job so he took it to work and had a buddy carve some styrofoam for him and wouldn't you know it...the box was damaged in transit.

    I let the dude know that there were no hard feelings and that we'll scrap the trade. FedEx sent his box back. I never sent my box since I'm not stupid and was waiting to receive mine after all the delays. I told him it would suck to have to replace the beers plus pay for shipping again. He seems to want to make it right but I'm passed that point. Plus he's on vacation so that box is just sitting on his doorstep until he gets back.

    My question: How do we handle this here? I'm thinking more in terms of feedback. If I leave him Neutral feedback he may leave me negative and I've been nothing but understand. Just at my wits end at this point. I've been lucky that every trade I've had here has gone smooth and I've never been jerked around. What say you, beeradvocate?
     
    #1 shirtless_mike, Apr 17, 2015
  2. pest

    pest Savant (1,039) Sep 2, 2007 Ohio
    Trader

    I'd agree just to leave no feedback and let the trade fall off after the 3 month period or whatever BA set the expiration time at.
     
    #2 pest, Apr 17, 2015
    evilcatfish, maximum12, shirtless_mike and 2 others like this.
  3. AndyEdgar

    AndyEdgar Initiate (0) Feb 2, 2014 Illinois

    Well there really wasn't ever a trade, so I wouldn't leave any feedback at all. Don't trades disappear out of the system out of a while?
     
    #3 AndyEdgar, Apr 17, 2015
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  4. paulys55

    paulys55 Initiate (0) Aug 2, 2010 Pennsylvania

    Kind of a tough one. I would have to see his trading history to give you a better answer. I want to say that I wouldn't even leave feedback because the trade never happened and you were not out any beer/money (correct me if i'm wrong). On the other hand, if his trading history isn't perfect, then maybe say something along the lines of "trade fell through" or something like that.
     
    #4 paulys55, Apr 17, 2015
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  5. shirtless_mike

    shirtless_mike Maven (1,440) Aug 4, 2010 Indiana
    Trader

    I wasn't aware that trades fall off after 3 months. We'll go that route. I already have 2 trades lined up for the bottles I was sending him. Much smoother transactions with these 2.

    Thanks all.
     
    #5 shirtless_mike, Apr 17, 2015
  6. jrnyc

    jrnyc Grand Pooh-Bah (3,012) Mar 21, 2010 New York
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Revenge feedback is not allowed, if it happens, mods should be alerted, they assess the situation and have the power to delete the revenge feedback and/or ban the user.
     
    #6 jrnyc, Apr 17, 2015
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  7. shirtless_mike

    shirtless_mike Maven (1,440) Aug 4, 2010 Indiana
    Trader

    I feel like feedback is warranted on some level simply because he strung me along after the trade was agreed to. Yes, he sent a box but we'll never know what was in it. The trade changed several times because he drank what he was going to send, came back and said he didn't have bottles he originally did, etc..

    I don't want the next person to be shocked if this happens to them when trading with this dude.
     
    #7 shirtless_mike, Apr 17, 2015
  8. pest

    pest Savant (1,039) Sep 2, 2007 Ohio
    Trader

    I understand you frustration, I would be too. You were obviously very patient and reasonable with him. From the outside looking in I would say it appears he tried to make it right. Especially tracking down the original bottles from friends. With that said, it was completely necessary because drinking bottles you agreed to trade is obviously poor form at best. I'd call it a wash, because technically aren't you still on the hook for the trade since its open and you have already made arrangements to trade those bottles? You probably should have waited for an agreed upon resolution before doing that. (Maybe you guys already have)
     
    #8 pest, Apr 17, 2015
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  9. Vivified

    Vivified Initiate (0) Jul 9, 2014 California

    You agreed to a trade through the system here on BA. He delayed and delayed and his box ended up being damaged en route so you decided to cancel the trade. I completely understand that situation and that is your right. But, YOU HAVE to leave feedback, you have to let potential traders know. I'd say neutral and report him if he leaves negative.
     
    #9 Vivified, Apr 17, 2015
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  10. mythaeus

    mythaeus Pooh-Bah (2,074) Jul 22, 2013 Pennsylvania
    Pooh-Bah Trader

    Let this one go and let the trade request disappear. It doesn't sound to me that he tried to screw you on purpose, although at times wasn't quite all there, but key delaying circumstances seem beyond his control. The guy lost his beer in the end and offered to make it right to which you declined. You ended up trading the beers anyway.
     
    #10 mythaeus, Apr 17, 2015
  11. shirtless_mike

    shirtless_mike Maven (1,440) Aug 4, 2010 Indiana
    Trader

    I understand he wasn't trying to screw me but saying you have bottles that you don't after the trade is confirmed on top of drinking bottles after it's been confirmed...not exactly the way to go about doing things.

    Anyways. I'm alright with letting this one fade away sans feedback but if anyone wants his username for their own personal Do Not Trade lists don't hesitate to PM me.
     
    #11 shirtless_mike, Apr 17, 2015
  12. JavaNoire

    JavaNoire Savant (1,163) Dec 4, 2010 Iowa

    I'm with those who say let it go. However, it's your trade & your fb to leave or not. You don't seem inclined to let it go. IF you truly feel that it warrants neutral fb then that's what you should leave. .
     
    #12 JavaNoire, Apr 17, 2015
  13. rockernino

    rockernino Initiate (0) Aug 10, 2014 California

    Bummed that this happened. I wonder if a moderator will see this thread and offer some input. I've always wondered how often Neutral Feedback gets used and what circumstances warrant it.
     
    #13 rockernino, Apr 18, 2015
  14. nc41

    nc41 Initiate (0) Sep 25, 2008 North Carolina
    Trader

    Wow , that's a shit load to happen to any one guy on one single trade. Put him on a do not trade list for yourself and don't deal with him again. Sounds like bullshit to me, no one is that unlucky. I'd think about the neutral if your out money buying his beer whether shipped or not.
     
    #14 nc41, Apr 18, 2015
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  15. F2brewers

    F2brewers Maven (1,432) Mar 12, 2005 Massachusetts
    Society Trader

    i'm of the opinion to let it go.

    wouldn't want to trade with your partner, but after doing this for 10+ years, the excuses don't matter.

    there are far too many awesome traders to let it color your POV.
     
    #15 F2brewers, Apr 18, 2015
    JavaNoire, maximum12 and tommyz like this.
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