LIF: Not Enough Time on BA

my now 4 year old (when he was three and just learning how to use the big boy pottie) dropped his drawers in Macy's and squatted on manequin who was in an indian style sitting position. The wife and I both noticed he was sitting, but didnt notice his pants bunched up by his ankles. Needless to say the words "who shat their pants?" Then Brayden stands up, pants down around his ankles, and says "not me, I used the pottie". Needless to say, the manequit didnt have a hole to "deposit" so not only do I have to apologize that he deficated in the manequins lap, but also had to clean his ass right there.

 

Please clarify, proud or embarrassing?

 

proud that he didnt poop his pants, embarassed because while I'm cleaning him up, he says "daddy, I pooped like I was supposed to"

 

Every time I go out to the garage, my 1.5 year old comes running after me saying "beer, beer". Then she'll dig through the beer fridge with me to find the perfect one for me to drink. She'll carry it out to the coffee table and even try to pour it in my glass while the cap still on. When I empty a bottle, she'll take it in to the kitchen and stretch as far as she can to put it up on counter. She gets her water cup, says "cheers, cheers" and clinks my glass with her cup. This happens pretty much every day. I'm obviously very proud of my little girl.

 

I bet he is embarrassed now but in a few years he will be proud to tell the tale.

 

I don't qualify for the LIF, my kids are all teenagers now. When my youngest was going through potty training it was in the summer. We used to go camping a lot when the weather was nice. We were on a hike and the little man says he has to go. So I walk him over behind a tree so he could do his business. No problem. We get home and a couple days later, he comes up to me and says he has to go. So I say ok, go ahead and I will be there in one minute. It didn't dawn on me until about 30 seconds after I heard the door open and close. I run out side only to see him taking a wiz on the tree in the parkway right next to the street. We live right by a park and there is always people walking and driving by going to the park when it is nice out. It just happens that there was a ton of people out at that time and all of them saw it. It caused quite the little scene, especially because I couldn't stop laughing.

 

My four-year-old told my wife the other day, when I wasn't around, that she wants to be like me when she grows up. When my wife asked her why, my girl said, "So I can drink beer". This is my proud moment, I think?

 

my boy always asks me "you want me to get you a beer daddy?" which makes me chuckle every time.

 

I too don't qualify, my son is still in utero....

 

Ditto. Except daughter, due in July.

 

When in July? My man's due on the 30th.

 

No shit! Mine is the 28th.

 

Congrats! We expect ours early (my wife is TINY) so it's a race to the finish!

 

Haha. That's too funny because so is my wife and we've been thinking the same thing. Good luck buddy!

 

My son, now four, wrote in school, for Daddy Likes to eat (fill in the blank) "Pasta and Beer"

A little embarrassed considering he had to dictate it to his pre-school teacher!

This is why you always keep something to blackmail them with in the future:

 

For some reason, my 4 year old daughter loves The Biggest Loser. About a year ago she and I went to the grocery store and there happened to be a gym in the same shopping center. As we were driving through the parking lot on the way out she asked me to put her window down as we passed the gym. I did and she immediately started yelling at the top of her lungs, "LAST CHANCE WORKOUT! LAST CHANCE WORKOUT!"

When she was about the same age, the whole family was in another store and it was sample day. An old lady at one of the tables gave her a sample and being the sweet old lady that she was, said, "You're going to share with your little brother, right?" (Her little brother was probably 4 months old at the time). In that matter-of-fact tone that only a 3 year old can master, she replied, "NO, he just eats my mommy's boobs." The lady's eyes got big and she gave me a look that said, "oh dear". I shrugged and said, "Well it's true".

 

I can't wait to get into all the inappropriate behavior and embarassing talk. My son is only 10 months, so not getting into the "good stuff" yet. I do have to say I feel pretty proud when he will stop what he is doing to "flirt" with girls no matter where we are at.

 

While my 2 year old daughter has pooped in several public locations, none have been quite as embarrassing as the stories already shared, so I will go for the proud angle.

My daughter is very good at saying thank you. She was recently in a large group of children that were being watched by one woman and when we went to pick her up, the person watching her commented that my daughter is the most polite child she has every met. Now, I myself am not the most polite person in the world but the thing that grinds my gears in this world more than anything else is entitlement. This goes for children in a store, adults at a beer release and everything in between (I am just as guilty of this as the next man). So when I hear that my daughter says thank you when she is given something, I am extremely proud that she is pushing the balance of the world away from entitlement and towards an attitude of thankfulness for all that she has.