"So close, yet so far away."

I have heard about in-laws who insist on doing what they want to do when you go to visit. Fortunately, I do not have this problem since most of my in-laws live no more than 1/2 hour away. The ones that live further away are totally cool about letting me do what I want. I have a sister-in-law who lives in NH about 1/2 hr. from Long Trail. She was good enough to take me there - and she doesn't even drink beer.
But I do have a suggestion to solve the OP's problem. Next time - don't go.

 

You must not be married...

 

Married with children, but really my wife/family are very considerate. They know I love beer, and if I wanted to stop by a brewery on a trip they would oblige.

 

I've taken my kids to several breweries, some like Great Divide that don't even serve food. You get some looks but who cares.

 

Agreed, so would mine. They loved the outdoor patio and gardens at Stone and I loved the beer.

 

You don't need to be married to know that relationships require give and take. No one in this thread is saying that OP should be able to go to all these places all the time, but it absolutely is unreasonable for him to never go to any at all. If his family isn't willing to indulge his interests at all then he has a remarkably inconsiderate family.

 

Tuck and roll!

 

I am from the Chicago area. I don't get to visit all that often. Every couple months maybe any more. My brother lives about 3 miles from Two Brothers. My wife goes and does stuff with my sister in law and takes our kids while my brother and I go to Two Brothers.

NANNER NANNER NANNER!

Also... we have all gone to Two Brothers with the kids. They have crayons and a kids menu. It is very family friendly. There is no need to choose between this brew pub and family, as you can do both.

 

I too am married and have children, and I get to stop at any brewery or shop I want that's on route.
I just think the blanket statement to "set the parameters" isn't an accurate way to portray the way things actually work.

In the case of the OP, it sounds like his inlaws are planning excursions, and their plans don't include time allotted for brewery stops. The approach I'd take if I were him would be to suggest a stop at one of his desired destinations, not to demand it.

As for my reply, I was mainly just making a joke, though I'm pleased to hear hanzo is married-- I find I like many of his posts, so it is cool to find another thing we have in common.
Cheers

 

I hear that....but he made it sound like they've gone to visit out there on several occasions, in which case it would be nice of them to do something for him since he likely does stuff he doesn't want to do on these trips with his wifes family. But if they only get out there once a decade then sure, going to a brewery is super low priority.

And I like stuff you post too <3

 

"...if beer is more important than spending time with family and friends, well, I'll just say I hope I manage to keep my own priorities straight..in both Washington and Oregon there are definitely brewpubs...bottle shops, and other beer-centric venues where minors are strictly forbidden to enter."

The point of the OPs post was neither ditching family & friends in favor of beer, nor was it about being turned away from establishments due to having children present.

He was saying, as I understood it, that he wished just once in a while that family activities in Illinois could include his interest in good beer.

Doesn't seem to me that a stop for lunch at a good family-friendly brewpub, or a short wait while he bought some beers to take home from a favorite brewery is too much an imposition on the rest of the family.

 

The OP never really directly mentioned whether he's saying to his family, "Hey, can we stop here" or "I'd really like to spend a little time @ (insert brewery) while we're in the area." I agree that he should express this desire assertively if it's really important to him. Make them say no. But as others have pointed out, the more people you have involved in a group activity, especially if none of the others are beer people, the harder time you're going to have getting everyone else to go along with what you want to do. There should definitely be some give and take, but sometimes it just doesn't work out.

That second part was kind of a tangent discussion, but it does relate to the OP's feeling of being "so close, yet so far." And the fact is, in some states, wanting to go to beer-related places does necessitate ditching the family, or at least the kids. The OP never mentioned whether he has kids, or what the laws are in Illinois about minors in these kinds of destinations—so I have no idea if this was a factor. But the OP did ask if "any of you BAs have had any 'so close, yet so far away' experiences," so I was simply sharing one of mine. It's not directly analogous, but it's definitely within the same realm of experience.

 

I recently went to NH with my girlfriend for memorial day weekend and I had it planned that we were going to several different places. Her parents had a bunch of things set up to do. I ended up finding a sweet bottle shop that we stopped at on the way home. It's all about compromise.

 

I'm laughing so hard at this. The higher the post count of this thread gets, the further and further the thread gets away from its intended purpose.

Thread continues to deliver.

 

They all do that.

 

My girlfriend knows that if we go to Cleveland for any reason whatsoever that Great Lakes is implied. Hell thats usually the reason we go, and visiting her dad is a second. I mean her dad usually takes us to Willoughby Brewing or Ferrante Vineyards anyway.

Dont worry, Ive driven by Fatheads and Brew Kettle, but havent stopped. Ive always been on business. You cant stop for beer at lunch when youre a teacher.

 

That could be debated. Let's do it in this thread right now!

 

You and me both.

The funny thing was, my sister-in-law's husband knew nothing about Alpine. He's lived in SD on and off for years, knew Green Flash, Lost Abbey, Ballast Point, Stone... but when I said I wanted to try to get up to Alpine he was like, "why, what the hell is up there?" Admittedly he's not into hoppy beers, prefers porters and stouts—so I picked up a Victory at Sea for him on one of my all-too-brief beer runs.

 

I got 99 problems but not hitting up breweries with the family aint one...

But really, if these trips are pretty regular, you've got to at least speak your mind an if it's still not even in the realm of possibility we just might have a problem Houston.