Tooth Bottle Opener

Given the costs of an implant I'll pass.

 

Don't need it. I can open a bottle with my teeth.

 

Lol! Some where an Onion writer went rogue!

 

Be careful. I used to do that until I chipped several teeth one night in college.

 

Usually I just stare at the bottle intensely until I have established dominance and it opens on its own.

 

I can only do it with one tooth. I don't do it anymore because I don't want that to happen. I've probably done it a couple hundred times, so I had a good career.

 

So how's Chuck Norris doing these days ?

 

My brother's an oral surgeon and I played lacrosse, on occasion without a helmet (just messing around). Anyway, I have no problem opening beer in a number of antiquated fashions. I feel no need to mimic Jaws from Moonraker.

 

This is fake, but not in a good way, kinda like Pam Anderson's post hep-C titties

 

Saw this on my wife's Dental Hygiene facebook page, one guess as how those killjoys thought about this awesome idea...

 

OH MY GOD!!!
I want one!!!

 

But what if a beer brand is covering the cost?

 

Then I'd turn and run, not walk, for the nearest exit.

 

C'mon now, Brian Williams has to start over somewhere, The Weekly World News isn't cloggin up the check out aisles any more & online is the perfect place to expound, embellish & inflate the hell out of anything.

 

I probably would too, but it looked like the people in the video had the brand on the tooth