Strawberry Mansion Blonde
13 Virtues Brewing

This is the fourth opportunity I’ve given Philadelphia’s to demonstrate that they know how to brew beer. It’s like giving some little league slugger four strikes. I try to be generous, but after three strikes you know what to expect.

This beer sucks. How else can I say it? It tastes like soap, but without the suds. There’s no head and not a solitary abstract splotch of lace. The taste harbors a peculiar ginger-like sweetness that drops rapidly towards an insipid wasteland of foulness. And not merely a common, arbitrary foulness, but a unique and inventive foulness that demonstrates some inspired creative effort.

The rest of this beer is notable for its anemic yet cloudy, peach-colored body, and a smell like kitchen water with a splash of shoe polish. There is no hint whatsoever of strawberries.