Cluster F%*K
Barreled Souls Brewing Company

Pours a cola colored brown with about a finger of light brown head that dissipated very quickly. Smell is heavy on the chocolate, not getting much of the nuts like I thought I would. Taste was all chocolate cold and the hazelnut started to come through as it warmed. Definitely not a thick stout, but still tasty.

 

2020 Release - 500ml bottle - #67 of 2000

Poured into a Barreled Souls balloon at 45°F.

Pours a surprisingly thin-looking glossy black - sitting black in the glass, with just a hint of brown sheen, and topped with a short sudsy dark khaki head - fair retention for a big beer, and receding to a persistent sudsy collar.

Nose: This nose is awfully dry and almost porter-like. Little-to-no perceivable malt sweetness, with a restrained, nutty roast that reminds me of a dry Irish stout. There's a fair bit of hazelnut, which is adding to that dry nutty quality, and beneath that, some shaved almond. At this point, it's not far off from a dark chocolate-covered but aroma. No dark fruit, no real caramel or brown sugar, no bold sweetness. It's a bit muted and not very exciting.

Palate: Clusterf%*k greets the palate with this odd roast profile, that like the nose, honestly tastes like a dry Irish stout. It isn't like any imperial stout I've ever had, and certainly out of character for the whole "adjunct stout" style. No real defined maltiness. Just ultralight roast and hazelnut. While the roast is like a Guinness, then this big, unnatural, borderline saccharine sweetness just floods in, like artificial sweetener, not malt. It overtakes the roast and really just leaves this thin, but clinging sweetness. Towards the finish, a bunch of nuts show up - more natural hazelnut, and almond. The almond is nice, but then it lends this almond shell bitterness that ruins it. Finish is nuts and cyanide.

Mouthfeel/Body: The pour kind of gave it away, but I had hoped for a surprise. I don't need my stouts to be chewy, but I like them hefty. This is about as thin as you could possibly get a stout with this ABV. There's really no malt heft at all. A touch of body from the 12+% ABV, but otherwise quite thin and runny with some fine carbonation underneath.

Overall: Wow. I'm not sure what to say. I know Barreled Souls is capable of absolutely nailing these big beers. There's a reason some are so sought-after. I can't believe this is theirs, and I can't believe they were willing to bottle and sell this. This is flawed in virtually every single way, to the point it's difficult to compliment it. The nut flavours are nice, until the bitterness hits. I don't think I can choke this one down. A rare miss, but a devastating one.