2017 Beer Resolutions

Beer Smack by | Jan 2017 | Issue #120
Illustration by Kaley McKean

It’s a fact: 2016 sucked for too many reasons, so let’s make 2017 an awesome year; at least beer-wise. Here are our tips to help achieve that goal.

Screw Lines
Put your chairs in storage. Stop camping out and waiting in lines for hours at a time. Life is too short, and there are plenty of other great beers to be had. Honest. Instead, spend more time drinking, learning, and socializing at local breweries and bars with your friends.

Put Away Your Phone
Seriously. Enough. You’re an addict, and it’s a bad look. No one cares about your overfiltered photo, the badges you’ve collected, or your expert opinion at this very moment. If you must, take a quick photo for later. But please, put your damn phone away, lift your head up, make eye contact, and enjoy the people and the world around you.

Mecca Schmecca
Visit a beer destination that’s not a so-called “beer mecca.” Most are overrated anyway, and you’ll be pleasantly surprised to discover how many cities have solid beer scenes today; lots of small towns do, too. Hell, some even rival the conventional meccas—many of which are saturated with sameness and mediocrity.

Turn That Trend Upside Down
Our collective palates have been overloaded with indistinguishable IPAs and crude sours thanks to uncreative breweries jumping on the latest trends, and they’re bored. It’s time to revisit forgotten beer styles and refresh unpopular ones, even if they’re not the flavor du jour.

Read Less, Read Better
As last year proved, there’s a lot of fake news out there. This applies to the world of beer, too, as more media outlets lean toward clickbait, fluff, unproofed articles, advertorials, and content from shills for hire in a desperate attempt to capture your attention and maximize profits. Try limiting your time to sources you trust, and stop wasting it on hacks and rumor-mongers.

Respect Beer.